*Warning: Spoilers ahead.*
Dear readers, what is happening in Fate of the Furious? How did a movie that once followed street racers as they outsmarted the LAPD become one of the most logic-defying films of all time? The convoluted plot devices in Fate of the Furious range from the plausible (grappling hooks embedded inside fancy cars) to the truly farfetched (Charlize Theron’s magic plane), and the film’s producers simply expect the audience to watch the film and not ask any questions. It’s possible the filmmakers didn’t care about all of the Fate of the Furious plot holes because they didn’t expect anyone to leave the theater without a fully-melted brain.
No one really cares about the Fast and the Furious plots, do they? At no point has anyone who truly loved these movies ever batted an eye at Vin Diesel pulling a bank vault out of a wall with a mid-2000's Chevy, or cared about whether Dwayne Johnson can actually take a bunch of rubber bullets to the chest and be totally fine. But the plot holes on this list are far too big to ignore.
Apparently if you're surrounded by cars during a massive explosion, you're going to be just fine. Not to be a jerk, but that seem implausible to say the least. You would think a heat-seeking missile that blows up a submarine would create such a large blast that anything within its immediate proximity would also blow up, be caught on fire, or at least pushed around a little bit. So when Dom manages to survive the blast because he's surrounded by cars and friendship, the entire physics of the film are called into question.
In the film, Theron's character, Cipher, lives on a 747 with two giant satellite dishes that constantly circles the globe, undetected by any and all government agencies. She seems to get off and on the plane at will, but there's no footage of the plane docked at an airstrip, and there's no scene where she takes a small plane out of the big plane to get to her earthly destinations. Although, at one point the plane does touch the ground for about 10 seconds so Diesel can drive into it. Other than that, it's in the air the entire time. Who is refueling this plane mid-flight? And when does it get the constant upkeep that a plane needs to stay in the air? How do they get food on there? The fans of the Furious need answers.
Speaking of which - how did they get Dom's baby and ex-girlfriend on board? At one point Jason Statham's character Deckard and Luke Evans's character Owen get onto the plane by using jet packs, and Dom drives onto the plane via the cargo hatch, so either Cipher brought the baby on board in a tiny jet pack, or the plane touched the ground long enough for goons to pop on board with a full-grown woman and baby in tow. Or, and this might actually be how it happened, Cipher brought Dom's baby mama Elena on board the plane while she was pregnant and then she gave birth to the baby. Woof, what a mess.
At the film's climax there's this super tense hack-off between Cipher and Nathalie Emmanuel's character Ramsey. They take turns hacking into a decommissioned Russian sub, and it's a lot like that scene in Hackers where the titular hackers are hacking against Fisher Stevens, but much less cool. Can you really hack into a sub through wifi or whatever? How can you start the engines of a submarine if you're not connected to it in one way or another? Ramsey is at least in a control tower while she hacks, but Charlize Theron is on a plane that never lands so someone please explain how this is possible.
Here's the thing, if Scott Eastwood's character Little Nobody had said to Roman (played by Tyrese Gibson) while he was drooling over the government's orange Lambo, "You can't drive that because it's an experimental, bullet-proof military car, and it's the only one we have," this would have been fine. But as far as the audience knows, Roman is driving a regular Lamborghini. So when he uses its door as a way to shield himself from multiple rounds fired by Russian separatists riding snowmobiles (don't ask) it seems farfetched to say the least.