Total Nerd
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Fictional Characters With Ludicrously Stupid 'Real Names'

Updated June 19, 2020 12.4k votes 1.7k voters 70.7k views18 items

List RulesVote up the characters who squirm every time they have to go to the DMV.

Talking about the real names of fictional characters looks like a silly thing on the surface. After all, does a fictional character possess a “real” name, anyway? But fictional characters are just like you! Meaning, fictional characters with dumb names get just as embarrassed of their parents' decisions as you do. The legal names of fictional characters range from the strange, to the bizarre, to the downright embarrassing. In most cases, these poor fictional characters received a ridiculous name not once but twice, from their real-world creator and then again from their in-universe parents. Mom and dad, trying to buck the fictional John name trend, instead decided to name you Veritably; naturally, you'd go for any other name in place of it, even if it were as simple as "Mr. Clean."

Some of the silly names of fictional characters provide a level of embarrassment to those unfortunate enough to wear such monikers. Others are hidden completely, and then revealed in a dramatic and humorous fashion. Occasionally, the real names of characters won’t even be revealed in universe, leaving fans scouring instruction manuals and appendices to find them. Did you ever catch the Monopoly Man's real name, or even Jughead's real name for that matter? It's okay, they never wanted you to know anyway.