As the 21st century began to loom over the world, everyone’s favorite Auntie’s boy seemed to have lost his sense of humor. Spider-Man jokes almost seemed like a thing of the past. He wasn’t as dour as The Punisher, but he cut out a lot of his silly quips, joined The Avengers (snooze), and died a couple of times - which is bound to kill anyone’s sense of humor. Thanks to Marvel’s desire to bring young readers into the fold, they’ve once again started writing your friendly neighborhood web slinger as a happy-go-lucky protagonist who would rather get a free lunch with She-Hulk than fight the Green Goblin for the 700th time.
Some of the jokes Spider-Man tells are very on brand for the wall crawler, while others seem like they were cooked up by comic book writers who had a chance to write for their favorite web head and didn’t want to waste the dialogue by having him pine for Mary Jane. These choice quips and funny spider-themed banter span Peter Parker’s 50-plus years as a superhero, and they prove that the wall crawler is at his best when he’s goofing off. Whether your favorite Spider-Man is Peter Parker, Miles Morales, Ben Reilly, or Doc Ock (long story), there’s a quip on here just for you.
When She-Hulk tells Spider-Man that she can help him get back at J. Jonah Jameson for running his name through the mud in The Daily Bugle, it seems like the simplest court case in the world. All they have to do is show up, embarrass the editor in chief, and hope that no super villains attack during the proceedings.
This panel is great, not just because it shows that Spidey's wit is as sharp as ever, but it proves just how slimy Jameson really is.
When did Spider-Man start breaking the fourth wall like fellow Marvel hero, Deadpool? Honestly, this panel from Runaways #11 raises so many questions about the Marvel Universe. Why are there superhero movies in a world where there are already superheroes? Are there comic books? Does Peter Parker identify with Batman because his parents are also dead?
Doesn't it make sense that Spider-Man should be able to control all of the spiders in the world? Or at least carry a bunch of little spiders in his pockets? That's what we would do if we were Spider-Man. This panel comes from one of the most chaotic and truly funny issues of Marvel Adventures: Spider-Man, where the wall crawler has to go head to head with Emma Frost, and a new super villain who may or may not be very good at his job. Also he's apparently never heard of Spider-Man.
When Tony Stark decides to build out The Avengers in order to make the world safer than it already is with the standard team (not to mention Avengers West Coast but whatever), he reaches out to a few guys who should have been on the team a long time ago: Wolverine, Spider-Man, and The Falcon. Tony plays to all of their weaknesses, and if you've ever read a Spider-Man comic you know that Peter's is money.
Not only has he spent his entire life trying to support Aunt May, but depending on what series we're in he's got Mary Jane to think of as well. It's actually kind of crazy that Peter didn't become the world's greatest villain in issue 2 of The Amazing Spider-Man - the money's definitely better.