quotations The Funniest Famous Movie Speeches Of All Time  

William Neckard
1.3k votes 947 voters 475.0k views 17 items Embed

Some of the funniest movie speeches ever, not surprisingly, can be found in some of the most hilarious classic film comedies. Whether it's Bluto trying to be motivational by rallying his frat brothers in the comedic Animal House, Ferris' many speeches to the camera in Ferris Bueller's Day Off or Groucho Marx entertaining a room filled with party-goers in Animal Crackers, these funny movie speeches represent the best of the best where hilarity is concerned. Check out inspiring movie speeches and the best tough guy monologues, too! 

Limiting a list of funny monologues from movies was a challenge– while most of these are from comedy movies, others are from funny parts of more serious movies. I'm sure I left off some of your favorites, so if I did, please add them. This is an Open List, meaning anyone can contribute. Please do! And while you're here, vote on your favorites, too.

What are some famous funny speeches? What are the funniest movie speeches ever? Looking for more movie speeches and monologues? Check out this list of the most inspiring movie speeches and this list of the best, most famous movie monologues for fun!

back to page 1
39 20


Ranker Video
Video: YouTube

License to kill gophers by the government of the United Nations. Man, free to kill gophers at will. To kill, you must know your enemy, and in this case my enemy is a varmint. And a varmint will never quit - ever. They're like the Viet Cong - Varmint Cong. So you have to lie back on superior intelligence and superior firepower. And that's all she wrote.

Bill Murray's demented groundskeeper, Carl Spackler, in 1980's Caddyshack is my favorite Murray character ever. His description of why gophers (aka Varmint Cong) must die is a classic.

Also Ranked

#74 on The Greatest Movie Themes

#7 on The Best Sports Movies

#61 on The Most Rewatchable Movies

#57 on The Greatest Movies of the 1980s, Ranked

see more on Caddyshack
55 34

Blazing Saddles

Ranker Video
Video: YouTube

I don't know if you ever heard of me before, but I used to be called 'The Waco Kid.' I was just walking down the street, and I heard a voice behind me say, "Reach for it Mister!" I spun around and there I was face to face with a six-year-old kid. Well I just threw my guns down and walked away....little bastard shot me in the a**! So I limped to the nearest saloon, crawled inside whiskey bottle, and I've been there ever since.

Gene Wilder's Jim (The Waco Kid) delivers a hilarious speech explaining his history in 1974's Mel Brooks comedy Blazing Saddles.

Also Ranked

#33 on The Best Western Movies Ever Made

#28 on The Best '70s Movies

#31 on The Best Movies Roger Ebert Gave Four Stars

#4 on The Absolute Funniest Movies Of All Time

see more on Blazing Saddles

Ranker Video
Video: YouTube

Over? Did you say 'over?!' Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!

And it ain't over now. 'Cause when the goin' gets tough...the tough get goin'! Who's with me? Let's go! Come on! (runs out, nobody follows, runs back in) What the f**k happened to the Delta I used to know? Where's the spirit? Where's the guts, huh? 'Ooh, we're afraid to go with you Bluto, we might get in trouble.' Well just kiss my ass from now on! Not me! I'm not gonna take this. Wormer, he's a dead man! Marmalard, dead! Niedermeyer...

Otter interrupts Bluto's motivational speech at this point, throwing his support behind his frat brother, even though he's "psychotic."

In this classic funny speech from 1978's Animal House, Bluto (John Belushi) has just learned that Dean Wormer has kicked them all out of school. His speech rallying tries his fraternity brothers together is one for the ages.

Also Ranked

#42 on The Best '70s Movies

#90 on The Best Movies Roger Ebert Gave Four Stars

#49 on Movies with the Best Soundtracks

#9 on The Absolute Funniest Movies Of All Time

see more on National Lampoon's Animal House
38 25


Ranker Video
Video: YouTube

So, OK, like right now, for example, the Haitians need to come to America. But some people are all "What about the strain on our resources?" But it's like, when I had this garden party for my father's birthday right? I said R.S.V.P. because it was a sit-down dinner. But people came that like, did not R.S.V.P. so I was like, totally buggin'. I had to haul ass to the kitchen, redistribute the food, squish in extra place settings, but by the end of the day it was like, the more the merrier! And so, if the government could just get to the kitchen, rearrange some things, we could certainly party with the Haitians. And in conclusion, may I please remind you that it does not say R.S.V.P. on the Statue of Liberty?

Cher's speech to the class expressing her unique views on Haitian immigrants in 1995's Clueless is definitely interesting. Clueless is a great comedy - and, in my opinion, pretty underrated.

Also Ranked

#19 on The Best Movies of 1995

#10 on The Greatest Chick Flicks Ever Made

#5 on The Best Movies for Young Girls

#21 on The Funniest '90s Movies

see more on Clueless