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105 voters

The Most George Lucas-Ass Names In Baseball

Updated January 28, 2021 1.4k votes 105 voters 1.4k views32 items

In December 2016, Vice Sports contributing editor David Roth somehow managed to combine some of the best Star Wars-related writing and baseball-related writing of the year into one glorious piece: "What Are the Most Egregiously George Lucas-A** Names in Baseball?" The question, as Roth put it, was "robustly engaged," because it turns out there are a ton of baseball players with George Lucas-ass names. A "George Lucas-ass name," according to Roth, is a name that is "overstated and goofy in the same ways that the names George Lucas has given to characters in his Star Wars universe are overstated and goofy." More specifically, it "must sound like the name of a character in a mid-century adventure novel, and it must also have some broad space-age vibes and a general air of arch artificiality."

Baseball players who would fit right in the Star Wars universe include Didi Gregorius (member of the Galactic Senate, for sure), Jett Bandy (a quippy, Han Solo-esque smuggler?), and Sicnarf Loopstok (a Cantina regular, of course). In honor of Roth's amazing observation, we've compiled a few dozen baseball players and managers with Star Wars names. Vote up the ones you think are the most "George Lucas-a**."

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  • 1
    70
    8

    Jaff Decker

    San Diego Padres, Tamba Bay Rays
  • 2
    58
    4

    Eppa Rixey

    Philadelphia Phillies, Cincinnati Reds
  • 3
    50
    10

    Callix Crabbe

    San Diego Padres
  • 4
    61
    25

    Jabari Blash

    Seattle Mariners, San Diego Padres
  • 5
    39
    8

    Sicnarf Loopstok

    Cleveland Indians
  • 6
    37
    7

    Nook Logan

    Detroit Tigers, Washington Nationals
  • 7
    38
    10

    Zip Zabel

    Chicago Cubs
  • 8
    33
    5

    Jot Goar

    Pittsburgh Pirates, Cincinnati Reds
  • 9
    36
    10

    Ambiorix Burgos

    Kansas City Royals
  • 10
    41
    16

    Yu Darvish

    Texas Rangers
  • 11
    30
    6

    Jedd Gyorko

    San Diego Padres
  • 12
    31
    10

    Laynce Nix

    Philadelphia Phillies, Milwaukee Brewers
  • 13
    27
    8

    Jett Bandy

    Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim
  • 14
    36
    20

    Touki Toussaint

    Arizona Diamondbacks
  • 15
    37
    22

    Chasen Shreve

    Atlanta Braves, New York Yankees
  • 16
    35
    22

    Jurickson Profar

    Texas Rangers
  • 17
    24
    10

    Didi Gregorius

    Philadelphia Phillies
  • 18
    35
    23

    Storm Throne

    Chicago White Sox
  • 19
    29
    23

    Mookie Betts

    Boston Red Sox
  • 20
    26
    22

    Ender Inciarte

    Arizona Diamondbacks, Atlanta Braves
  • 21
    29
    27

    Scooter Gennett

    Milwaukee Brewers
  • 22
    17
    12

    Izzy Alcantara

    Boston Red Sox, Milwaukee Brewers
  • 23
    20
    18

    Boof Bonser

    Minnesota Twins, Minnesota Twins
  • 24
    21
    21

    Yonder Alonso

    Cincinnati Reds, San Diego Padres
  • 25
    21
    22

    Orlando Calixte

    Kansas City Royals