Get Hard movie quotes bring the laughs that come when one businessman hires his only black friend to prepare him for a prison sentence. The comedy film was directed by Etan Cohen using a screenplay by Jay Martel and Ian Roberts. Get Hard opened in theaters on March 27, 2015.
In Get Hard, wealthy businessman James King (Will Ferrell) seems to have it all in life. He has a huge house and beautiful wife (Alison Brie), but that all changes when the FBI arrives to arrest him on charges of fraud and embezzlement. While James proclaims his innocence, a judge sentences him to 10 years at a maximum security facility.
James knows prison will be a culture shock so he hires the only black guy he knows, Darnell (Kevin Hart), to prepare him. While Darnell has never really been to prison, he takes the job and the two embark on prison school. But can a rich businessman get hard from this never-incarcerated family man and learn enough to get him through this sentence? The jury is still out on that one.
Joaquin: We gotta roll, Mayo.
Darnell: Who's Mayo?
James: It's my gang name. It's short for Mayonnaise.
Darnell: This is my prison-readiness program. You master these skills, you will survive in prison.
Darnell: Let me see what your mad dog face look like.
James: What is a mad dog face?
Darnell: You're a mad dog! Like a pit bull with no leash! Hah! ... What are you doing, James?
James: Sad-dogging you, you think that's a strategy that could work? Please don't sexually assault me, I'm already too sad.
James: My life is ruined cause after 30 days I'm going to prison. It's not as bad as I've heard, is it?
Darnell: Hell yeah, it's bad.
James: Teach me how to survive in prison the way you did.
Darnell: Tell me how you know I went to prison.
James: Given your low economic status...
Darnell: Wait, what?
James: Your perceived lack of college education...
Darnell: Lack of... Okay
James: Statistically, you definitely went to prison.
Darnell: Okay, I'll see you tomorrow, convict.
Gang Member: Who the hell are you?
James: I don't think they've ever seen a white person before.
Darnell: Trust me, that is not the problem.
James: I am looking to join the Crenshaw Kings.
Joaquin: Are you?
Darnell: He just wants you to protect him while he's on the inside.
Joaquin: Mr. I'm too good for the hood, I'll bounce you off this front porch sideways.
James: I'm sorry. I didn't understand a word you said.