You know how there are certain phrases that just instinctively send chills down your spine? Bad haircut. IRS audit. Assembly required. See? But perhaps the worst of these terrifying terms is the one that has the power to strike fear into the hearts of even the strongest humans: jury duty.
If you’ve ever gotten a jury duty summons and immediately been tortured with visions of sitting for hours listening to boring strangers argue, then you’ve come to the right place. Because thanks to these jury duty excuses, you’ll never have to waste your time doing your civic duty ever again. Here, you can find the cleverest, craziest, and wildest ideas about how to get out of jury duty.
A quick warning: you may want to research the following tactics before using them as reasons to get out of jury duty. Just to make sure they’re totally legal. While we’re fairly certain that making yourself appear as sleazy, unintelligent, or undesirable as possible during jury selection isn’t against the law, it’s better to be safe than sorry! Otherwise, you might find yourself on the wrong end of that courtroom.
That said, here you’ll find a list of everything from valid excuses, such as financial hardship, to outrageous ideas like soaking your clothes in vodka to make them think you’re an alcoholic.Keep in mind that during jury selection, lawyers can request that you be booted from the jury box before the trial ever begins, so scroll on down and check out some creative ways to up your odds. Jury duty exemptions are hard to come by, but there’s no way to win if you don’t try! Don’t see some of your favorite ways to get out of jury duty listed here? Add those bad boys to the list! You fellow lazy citizens will thank you.
Show up dressed like a thug and giggle and nod knowingly each time a non-violent offense is mentioned. There's no way the prosecutor will let you past the selection process.
Watching a lot of Law & Order doesn't count, but skimming a free online course on www.openculture.com before coming in for jury questioning means you can truthfully say that you have studied some law yourself. That makes lawyers nervous.
While it's a horrible idea to show up to any government building intoxicated, there are no laws that say your clothes can't reek of booze.They can't arrest if you're not actually drunk, and the mere suggestion that you're an alcoholic will probably be enough to get you a ticket home.