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20 of the Best "I Wasn't That Drunk" Texts

Updated February 14, 2020 43.2k votes 8.4k voters 2.5m views21 items

List RulesVote for your favorite recollections of drunken fun gone terribly wrong

Have you ever woken up after a night of drinking unable to remember your 80 proof-antics from the night before? Sometimes when you aren’t sure exactly what happened, playing it cool seems like the best idea. At least, that is, until one of your more lucid friends steamrolls your claims of "I wasn’t that drunk" by recalling one of your more embarrassing exploits. A really good friend will even reassure you that your most shameful moment is forever branded into everyone's memory but your own. 

These funny drinking texts recall with humiliating clarity the adventures of over-indulgent drinkers everywhere, who had momentarily dared to hope for the best. Below, you’ll find their claims of having it mildly together the night before utterly dashed by their friends’ all too clear memories of their drunken escapades. 

Vote up the best "I wasn't THAT drunk," texts below!

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  • 5

    SpongeBob is Much Sneakier Than We Thought

    SpongeBob is Much Sneakier Tha is listed (or ranked) 5 on the list 20 of the Best "I Wasn't That Drunk" Texts
    Photo: Pinterest
    1,654
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  • 6

    Well, She Probably is Now

    Well, She Probably is Now is listed (or ranked) 6 on the list 20 of the Best "I Wasn't That Drunk" Texts
    Photo: Pinterest
    1,772
    382
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  • 7

    Best Remake Ever

    Best Remake Ever is listed (or ranked) 7 on the list 20 of the Best "I Wasn't That Drunk" Texts
    Photo: Pinterest
    1,676
    390
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  • 8

    Not the First Drunk Guy to Have Issues Laying Pipe

    Not the First Drunk Guy to Hav is listed (or ranked) 8 on the list 20 of the Best "I Wasn't That Drunk" Texts
    Photo: Pinterest
    1,523
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