Customers And Employees Are Sharing Their IKEA Horror Stories, And We're Shaking In Our Söderhamns

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Vote up the most amusing yet slightly horrifying stories.

Over on Reddit, former employees, current employees, and customers who know the value of a dollar share their horror stories about visiting or working in an IKEA. From family meltdowns in the Allamåla section to meatball fights in the cafe, here area few stories that will make you think twice before you buy an Agunnaryd.

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  • 1
    474 VOTES

    'The Desk Still Holds Up, Though'

    From Redditor u/ProfessionalKvetcher:

    I went to IKEA last year with two friends of mine, a husband and wife, who own a pickup truck and could haul stuff. I needed exactly two things, a desk and an office chair, and they were just going to look around while I shopped. I walked into the store, picked out a desk and a chair, and wrote the numbers down. In and out of the office section in 90 seconds.

    Too late. Their attention had already been grabbed, and they spent the next 20 minutes discussing potential couches, chairs, dressers, beds, etc., all of which culminated in my friend saying the single worst thing he could have said in the moment - "This will be such a pain to move."

    "We're moving? Why are we moving?"

    "You know I've always wanted to move to Colorado."

    "Then why did I just leave the job I loved for the more permanent job here?"

    Holy sh*t, the floodgates were opened. What followed was no less than a 15-minute screaming argument in the [middle] of IKEA, which continued through the warehouse, through the checkout line, and into the parking lot. The argument started over him wanting to move and her wanting to stay, but quickly progressed to jobs, school, families, children, and ended when she snatched the keys from his hand, screamed a torrent of obscenities at both of us, and drove off.

    If you've never had to call someone to come pick you up with a couple of boxes because your friend just got divorced in the middle of an IKEA parking lot and your ride drove off, I can't recommend it. Desk still holds up, though.

  • 2
    405 VOTES

    Problem Man-Child

    From Redditor u/IvyKingslayer:

    [A couple] just had a brilliant argument about whether or not they could put a TV in their bathroom. He thinks it will fit, wife/girlfriend thinks it’s the stupidest idea ever, they don’t need it, it won’t fit, and if he wants to do that, then he can move back in with his mother.

    And he keeps asking her to give him half of her Daim cake.

    After about five minutes of whining, she told him if wanted some, he should have bought one because apparently he always does this.

    ...I left them in soft furnishing/textiles. He was "playfully" throwing pillows at her to get her attention. She turned around and said (scarily calmly), "I know that you think you’re being funny, but you’re not. So if you’re going to act like a child, I will treat you like a child. Start behaving like an adult or we’ll leave now and I’ll take away your Xbox for a week." 

    He pouted and marched off, muttering under his breath.

  • 3
    364 VOTES

    A Reason Not To Buy New Sheets

    From Redditor u/luckyvb:

    I was once shopping at IKEA and noticed a couple with the guy just having [a] complete look of apathy and distraction while being berated by his wife.

    The volume was fairly low until they got to the bedroom department and she specifically said,

    "I'm thinking of buying new sheets, but I might as well not 'cause I don't wanna buy sheets just so you can f*** that HR b**** in them. I hope you realize I'm just staying with your cheating a** until the kids are grown up."

    I was so distraught I went for Köttbullar to calm myself.

  • 4
    581 VOTES

    A Calculated Move

    From Redditor u/ikeathrowaway168151:

    I worked at IKEA for five years selling sofas. One of my coworkers, let's call him Jim, worked evenings and weekends in returns while his day job was teaching math at a local high school.

    One day a woman comes to the counter trying to return some pillows. Generally speaking, they didn't take returns on pillows for sanitary reasons. She also didn't have a receipt, and the pillows were clearly used and absolutely disgusting. Jim tells the customer that he's sorry, but our return policy states we only accept products within 30 days of purchase, with the receipt, and unused in the original packaging.

    This did not sit well with her and she began to scream at Jim. She was spiteful and cruel. Jim had come to the US from another country years ago, and while he spoke perfect English, [he] still had an accent. She mocked his accent and told him to speak English. She repeatedly shouted that he was stupid and would never amount to anything. He was too dumb to get a real job, etc.

    Meanwhile, her teenage son is in the background. He's pleading with his mother to stop shouting at Jim. He's begging her to give it up so they can go home. Eventually she turns around to shout at her son and ask him why he cares so much. "That's my calculus teacher..."

    There had already been a parent-teacher night scheduled for a few weeks later... [the boy's] father went alone.

  • 5
    441 VOTES

    A Lesson In Car-ma

    From Redditor u/intheweehours:

    This story isn't about [the] inside of IKEA; it's about the IKEA carpark...

    I'm busy packing stuff in the car - and it's a lot of stuff. My electric screwdriver at home is charged and ready for an afternoon of building flat-pack furniture. But still - it's taking some finagling to get all of the stuff into our car. And somebody... somebody has noticed that there is a parking space that is about to become free. They are waiting. They've been waiting for five minutes. He beeps his horn. Just a little polite beep.

    I gesture to the boxes that I have still to place in my car.

    I pack. I shift things around. I curse. He beeps his horn a couple of more times, somehow managing to convey that he is getting somewhat impatient. I smile at him. Gesture to my furniture.

    I finally have it all loaded. Carefully check that I can close the back of my car. He toots his horn again. I look at him and he gestures for me to get a move on. I'm less than pleased as his gesturing and impatience. It offends me mightily.

    I slowly saunter back with my cart to the nearby bay. I walk back over. He toots his horn again. Four long presses of "get a f**king move on." I get in my car and reverse out to the left - his car is behind me. He has to move back a bit so I [can] get my car fully out. I see him in my rear view mirror gesticulating angrily at me to his wife. He toots his horn again.

    F**k this... where I'm parked is near a junction, and I'm facing towards it. A car slowly comes around the corer at the junction. I sit there in my car, waiting. The car infront of me stops. I gesture for him to take the space. He does.

    The guy behind me goes absolutely mental, honking his horn. I can see him in my rear view mirror getting out of his car. I role down my window and give him the internationally recognized sign [for] "f**k you" and drive off.

  • 6
    414 VOTES

    'That's Your Job'

    From Redditor u/balexig:

    I work at a massive IKEA store in Australia. For a lot of people, it's their first time in IKEA, so by the time they get to my section, they start to panic because they aren't used to the maze-like layout. There are a lot of breakdowns...

    Anyway, the most memorable breakdown I dealt with was when I was working in home organisation. This man [marches] up to me, phone in hand and family in tow.

    He wants to buy a certain clothes rack, but he can't find it ANYWHERE in this STUPID STORE. Alright, mate, I'm happy to help you out. He shows me a picture on his phone. A screenshot from a website with no context. I haven't seen that clothes rack before. Either it's very new, very old, or not something that we stock.

    I ask if he knows the name of it.

    "No, that's YOUR job."

    He's getting even more worked up now. But I can't search with just an image. I check our store's website, and I can't find the damn clothes rack anywhere. I ask if he was sure he looked at (store location)'s website specifically. Immediately I can tell he feels insulted. OF COURSE HE LOOKED AT THE RIGHT WEBSITE. I activate dumb salesgirl mode and ask him to show me.

    He pulls up the website, and there is the clothes rack. Quite clearly on Target.com. He notices and storms off wordlessly.

    I got immense pleasure watching him get lost and do a couple loops through the store before finding the exit.