Crazy Top Secret Information You Won't Believe the Government Declassified  

Chris Lindvall
63.5k views 10 items

Ever wonder what really goes on behind the government's closed doors? Or what all that blacked-out text you see on top-secret classified documents actually says? Or whether your loony conspiracy-theory-touting uncle might be telling the truth?

Well, wonder no more. Thanks to the United States’ 2013 Freedom of Information Act, the doors have been flung open, the blacked-out text has been revealed, and your uncle has been completely and totally validated. Okay, on second thought, maybe just those first two.

Read on to discover some pieces of government declassified information that are downright bonkers. 

Did you know a U.S. state narrowly avoided nuclear catastrophe in the 60s? Or that one president’s brain was lost during his autopsy and is still missing to this day? Or that a famous author willingly participated in the CIA’s unethical human experimentation?

Put on your tinfoil hat and dive deep into the world of government-declassified info that will make your head spin. Who knows, maybe one day you’ll be someone's loony uncle.

No One Knows Where JFK's Brain Is
No One Knows Where JFK's B... is listed (or ranked) 1 on the list Crazy Top Secret Information You Won't Believe the Government Declassified
Photo: Cecil Stoughton/Wikimedia Commons/Public Domain

Ask anyone who was alive when President John F. Kennedy was shot and they'll remember exactly where they were when they heard the news. Too bad the physicians who performed his autopsy didn't have as strong of memories. At some point during his post-mortem, the government admitted that JFK's brain was straight up lost. To this day no one knows where it is, though many conspiracy theorists believe this only strengthens the case that Lee Harvey Oswald was not the only shooter. Still others maintain that some Kennedy superfan stole it, keeping the former president's brain as a creepy trophy.

The U.S. Planned to Go to War with Cuba
The U.S. Planned to Go to War ... is listed (or ranked) 2 on the list Crazy Top Secret Information You Won't Believe the Government Declassified
Photo: Warren K. Leffler/Wikimedia Commons/Public Domain

At the height of the Cold War, United States would stop at nothing to get ahead. Among their most sinister plans was Operation Northwoods. Through Northwoods, top military leaders concocted various plans to create public support for a war against Cuba with the ultimate goal of overthrowing dictator Fidel Castro. Their plans detailed how they would go about fostering such public support, including but not limited to killing innocent U.S. civilians and sinking boats of Cuban refugees. Northwoods was approved by every level of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, but was vetoed at the top level by President John F. Kennedy.

The U.S. Considered Using a "Gay Bomb"
The U.S. Considered Using a &#... is listed (or ranked) 3 on the list Crazy Top Secret Information You Won't Believe the Government Declassified
Photo: chripell/Wikimedia Commons/CC BY-SA 2.0

The 1990's were a pivotal time in the United States, but not everything was awesome cartoons and Capri Suns. In 1994, a three-page proposal from the Pentagon was released that described a list of theoretical, nonlethal chemical weapons. Among these weapons was something called the "gay bomb," which is exactly what it sounds like. When detonated, the bomb would emit female sex pheromones, thereby compelling those in the blast radius to be sexually attracted to one another. The weapon was abandoned when it failed to function properly and now only lives on as a 30 Rock joke.

Two H-bombs Almost Went off on American Soil
Two H-bombs Almost Went off on... is listed (or ranked) 4 on the list Crazy Top Secret Information You Won't Believe the Government Declassified
Photo: United States Department of Energy/Wikimedia Commons/Public Domain

On January 3, 1961, the people of Goldsboro, North Carolina woke up, went about their day, and fell back asleep, unaware that their town had barely avoided utter catastrophe. Around midnight, a B-52 bomber carrying two Mark-39 Hydrogen bombs went into a complete tailspin above the city. The pilots ejected as their plane was on a collision course just outside of the town. The first bomb landed without incident, but the second worked exactly how it was supposed to, set to explode on impact. As the massive nuclear bomb fell, three of the four arming switches activated, but the last one malfunctioned, averting a nuclear disaster on American soil. One measly broken safety switch prevented the name Goldsboro from being forever associated with tragedy.