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Jason Statham's Résumé Of Cinematic Jobs, Ranked By Whether You'd Hire Him  

Eric Vega
638 votes 102 voters 4.8k views 17 items

List Rules Vote up the jobs Jason Statham is most qualified to perform.

Jason Statham is probably the closest you'll find to a professional bad*ss. The British actor just exudes coolness, no matter what role he's playing - and he's played a lot of roles. Statham has quite the movie résumé, and that's not only a reference to his long list of credits. His characters have tons of experience in a wide variety of career fields, from driving services to the restaurant industry. In the last couple of decades, he's played a spy, a cop, a car salesman, a paleontologist, and people with a whole bunch of other random jobs.

Statham's onscreen résumé would blow the average person's out of the water, but he hasn't always been successful at every job he's tried. Sometimes he drops the ball like the rest of us, but there's no denying he's a committed employee. Which job do you think Jason Statham is most qualified to perform?

Furious 7 is listed (or ranked) 1 on the list Jason Statham's Résumé Of Cinematic Jobs, Ranked By Whether You'd Hire Him
Photo: Furious 7/Universal Pictures

When And Where: Crank franchise; Fast & Furious franchise; Mechanic franchise

Skills: Proficiency with a variety of "tools" and poisons, proficient driver of cars and motorcycles, special forces training

Professional Accomplishments: Survived being injected with a life-ending toxin, beat Luke Hobbs (The Rock) in a fight, took out the leader of a Colombian cartel

Professional Failures: Betrayed by his boss, detained by Luke Hobbs

Personal Reference: Luke Hobbs, Eve Lydon, Gina Thorton

Would you hire this man?
see more on Furious 7
The Expendables is listed (or ranked) 2 on the list Jason Statham's Résumé Of Cinematic Jobs, Ranked By Whether You'd Hire Him
Photo: The Expendables 3/Lionsgate

When And Where: The Expendables franchise

Skills: Blade specialist, undercover reconnaissance, tactical expert

Professional Accomplishments: Founding member of mercenary group The Expendables, helped depose an authoritarian Latin American government, helped free an enslaved village

Professional Failures: Betrayed by a former Expendable

Personal Reference: Barney Ross, Gunner Jensen, Toll Road

Would you hire this man?
see more on The Expendables
3
Chaperone/Body Guard
Wild Card is listed (or ranked) 3 on the list Jason Statham's Résumé Of Cinematic Jobs, Ranked By Whether You'd Hire Him
Photo: Wild Card/Lionsgate

When And Where: Wild Card

Skills: Hand-to-hand combat, client loyalty, detective work, quick-witted negotiator

Professional Accomplishments: Tracked down and ended the people who went after one of his clients 

Professional Failures: Mostly works to fuel his crippling gambling addiction

Personal Reference: Baby (Kingpin of Las Vegas), Holly

Would you hire this man?
The Meg is listed (or ranked) 4 on the list Jason Statham's Résumé Of Cinematic Jobs, Ranked By Whether You'd Hire Him
Photo: The Meg/Warner Bros. Pictures

When And Where: The Meg

Skills: Deep-sea diving, submarine piloting skills

Professional Accomplishments: Single-handedly took out a Megalodon, saved his ex-wife and her colleague from a thermocline

Professional Failures: Lost two of his men in a failed attempt to rescue the crew of a mangled nuclear submarine

Personal Reference: James "Mac" Mackreides, Suyin Zhang

Would you hire this man?
see more on The Meg