Being an A-List star like Johnny Depp has its perks. Beyond the obvious stuff like having enough money to buy your own private island, and being able to escape from the Australian penal system relatively unscathed, you never age and you never suffer from hair loss! Sort of. Unless our theory about celebrities being a part of an ageless coven of acting witches is correct, you can bet that with the cash that comes with a hundred million dollar film opening you can buy some pretty great plastic surgery. Or in Johnny Depp’s case, you can buy the best hairpieces known to man. We know, it’s basically heresy to say that your boyfriend, Johnny Depp, is losing his hair as he grows older and might be vain enough to purchase wigs and weaves of various lengths, but it’s true! We think. To back up our hypothesis of Depp’s balding, we’ve put together a list of the many terrible wigs of Johnny Depp. Maybe after you read it you’ll see the light.
Some of the absolutely horrendous wigs on this list are from his films where, admittedly, he has very little control over what he wears. (In fact he probably has little control ever - Johnny Depp fashion is a serious business with many parties involved, to be sure) But the disconcerting thing is that he tried to pass off a lot of these hairpieces as his actual hair. How dumb do you think we are Johnny Depp? We can spot a Johnny Depp hair piece (or Affleck or Travolta one, for that matter) from a mile away.Prepare to be assaulted with the absolutely proof of Johnny Depp’s hair loss with this list of the absolutely terrible wigs he’s worn throughout his career. When you’re done cursing the heavens, vote up the most obviously horrible Johnny Depp wig below. And if you want to hash it out about Johnny Depp’s hair and overall style in the comments we suggest you bring your A game.
The Nick Lachey
While doing press in 2009, Depp was spotted sporting this boy band-inspired hair piece that really works well (i.e. looks worse) with a pair of purple sunglasses.
Pirates of the Wigabbean
Try not to associate Johnny Depp's career-bolstering turn as Captain Jack Sparrow in the massive Pirates of the Caribbean series with Bret Michaels from Poison. We dare you.
We Thought Your Roots Were Black?!
Johnny wouldn't lie to us would he? We've lived all our lives believing Johnny Depp had jet black hair and now we're to believe it's brown? We'll chalk this up to the parallel universe of Secret Window... for now.
Everyone Looks 10 Pounds Heavier When They're Wearing a Wig
While filming The Tourist in Venice, Depp seemed to have about fifteen pounds of weave glued to his head. Judging from the density of the hair piece, the make up artist either used an old wig from Edward Scissorhands or a giant gopher.