Parents Are Sharing The Most Embarrassing Things Their Kids Have Ever Done In Public

From Redditor u/jessujak:

We were at a crowded family pub, outside. Little one was about 4/5. He ran away from the table so I picked him up and swung him over my shoulder, head facing down. He lifted up my dress over his head. Flashed my butt to everyone.

From Redditor u/urbancowgirl42:

My oldest had a talent for finding hard surfaces with his head. He smacked into a door frame at preschool when he fell off a bouncy horse and had a huge goose egg in the middle of his forehead.

Gravity did its thing and the blood in the goose egg slid down his face, blacking both eyes. A few days after he looked like he went 3 rounds with Mike Tyson.

He was at the airport with his aunt and cousin waiting for Grandma to get off the plane. A lady said, “Oh, you have two beautiful children.”

Now, he could have said. “Oh, this is my aunt,” or “She’s my cousin.” Instead, he looked up at her sadly with two black eyes and said, “I don’t belong to these people.”

His aunt hissed, “You’re gonna get me in trouble!”

TL;DR: When my son had an accidental black eye, he was with his aunt. Someone complimented the family saying, “Oh, you have two beautiful children.” My son's response took a dark turn. 

From Redditor u/SeaTie:

For some reason when my kid was learning the word “Freckle” it came out “F*ck you.”

So, we were in line at Starbucks and I was holding my daughter and this lady comes up behind us who had a freckle on her cheek and my daughter points and goes “F*ck you.”

From Redditor u/DelawareDime:

My 5 year old and I signed up for karate. Her class goes first while I read a book in the seats in the back and then my class while she waits with a coloring book. Lots of other families in our classes do the same arrangement.

While I’m at the very front of the room, I hear another parent at the back of the room tell my daughter that she didn’t see us in class the night prior. My 5 yr old responds saying, "I KNOW. My mom had the poopy poops so bad. You would NOT believe it. She was all like uuuughhh. Aaahhhhgghh. In the bathroom for HOURS."

I had to drop out of that karate class and change my name because I did not drop dead of embarrassment like I wanted to.

TL;DR: My daughter told a parent the reason we missed a karate class was because I was having stomach issues.

From Redditor u/Non_Invasive_Species:

My wife and our 3 and a 1/2 year old son and I went shopping in a Sears department store looking for bathroom fixtures. My son disappeared for a couple minutes and his mother and I, in a panic, found him peeing in a display commode.

TL;DR: Our son used one of the toilet displays at a Sears. 

From Redditor u/Pasty_Hot_Dog_Legs:

We were at a restaurant and the four of us (wife and two kids) ordered. The waiter is standing next to my youngest, about 6 at the time, and puts his hand out. To me, he quite clearly wants my son to return the menu. My son quickly glanced up at the waiter, then at his hand, then at me like “what do I do?”

Before anyone can say anything my son reaches in his mouth, pulls out his chewing gum, and sticks it right in this poor man’s hand. I turned bright red and wanted to disappear.

Only after I realized I do the same unspeaking hand gesture when I want him to give me his gum before eating or in church. Such an innocent mistake but that one hurt.

TL;DR: We were at a resturant when the waiter held out his hand for the menu. My son misread the gesture and put his chewed gum in the waiter's hand instead of the menu.