For all you Monty Python fans, here are the best quotes from Life of Brian, ranked by fans like you. Life of Brian is a Monty Python production dating back to 1979 of a hapless man mistaken as a Messiah. The movie was a satirical comedy of biblical proportions and, since the topic was religion, was summarily misunderstood by the public. Banned in several countries for blasphemy and such, the film was ironically a huge box office success, perhaps due to the reverse psychology and notoriety. Nevertheless, there are a lot of funny lines from Life of Brian, and the film still holds up to this day.What are your favorite Life of Brian quotes? Upvote the ones you love below and watch the rise to the top of the list.
- 1130 VOTES
How Do We... What?
Brian: ...Will you please listen? I'm not the Messiah! Do you understand? Honestly!
Woman: Only the true Messiah denies his divinity!
Brian: What? Well, what sort of chance does that give me? All right, I am the Messiah!
Crowd: He is! He is the Messiah!
Brian: Now, f*ck off!
Arthur: How shall we f*ck off, oh Lord?
Brian: Oh, just go away! Leave me alone!Should this be higher or lower?
- 2133 VOTES
Matthias: Look, I don't think it should be a sin, just for saying "Jehovah."
Jewish Official: You're only making it worse for yourself!
Matthias: Making it worse? How can it be worse? Jehovah! Jehovah! Jehovah!
Jewish Official: I'm warning you! If you say "Jehovah" one more time... RIGHT! Who did that? Come on, who did it?
Crowd: She did! She did! He! He did! He!
Jewish Official: Was it you?
Jewish Official: Right...
Person: Well you did say "Jehovah."
Jewish Official: STOP IT! STOP IT! STOP IT RIGHT NOW! STOP IT! All right, no one is to stone anyone until I blow this whistle. Even... and I want to make this absolutely clear... even if they do say, "Jehovah."Should this be higher or lower?
- 367 VOTES
Art of Haggling
Brian: How much? Quick.
Brian: It's for the wife.
Storekeeper: Oh. Uhhh, twenty shekels.
Brian: There you are.
Storekeeper: Wait a minute.
Storekeeper: Well, we're-- we're supposed to haggle.
Brian: No, no. I've got to get--
Storekeeper: What do you mean, "no, no, no"?
Brian: I haven't time. I've got--
Storekeeper: Well, give it back, then.
Brian: No, no, no. I just paid you.
Storekeeper: This bloke won't haggle.
Burt: Won't haggle?!
Brian: All right. Do we have to?Should this be higher or lower?
- 465 VOTES
Ben the Prisoner: Quite the jailer's pet, are we?
Brian: What do you mean?
Ben the Prisoner: You must have slipped him a few shekels, eh?
Brian: Slipped him a few shekels - you saw him spit in my face!
Ben the Prisoner: Oh, what wouldn't I give to be spat at in the face? I sometimes hang awake at night, dreaming of being spat at in the face.
Brian: Well it's not exactly friendly, is it? They have me in manacles!
Ben the Prisoner: Manacles! Ooooh, my idea of heaven, is to be allowed to be put in manacles. Just for a few hours... they must think the sun shines out your a**, sonny.Should this be higher or lower?