9 WTF Stories Of LBJ's Obsession With His Presidential Privates

President Lyndon B. Johnson allegedly had a massive ego. His famous initials, for example, were monogrammed on his belt buckles, shirts, and gold cufflinks he wore while in office, and he brazenly grazed those cufflinks up the skirts and against the thighs of an untold number of mistresses, all while the long-suffering Lady Bird sat at his side. Johnson famously acted like a man who believed he was the most well-hung politician to ever hold the presidency, and even occasionally openly displayed his presidential privates.

Yes, LBJ's genitalia is the stuff of legend, but not urban legend: it’s all there in Robert Caro’s girthy, exhaustive biography. LBJ likely thought he had the largest ever member in the history of politics. He also thought the size of his pecker mattered, and he wasn’t at all shy about it. The list below features all the extant stories about his famous phallus, a string of penetrating narratives.


  • He Called His Penis 'Jumbo'

    He Called His Penis 'Jumbo'
    Photo: Yoichi Okamoto / Wikimedia Commons / Public Domain

    LBJ’s obsession with his member began — at least publicly — in college, where Johnson exhibited his tentacle to his roommates, humbly christening it “Jumbo.” Coming home after dates, the coquettish commander-in-chief-to-be regaled his roomies with tales of Jumbo’s prowess and indefatigability, once proclaiming, “Jumbo had a real workout tonight.”

    The future leader of the free world would then reportedly describe his intimate companion’s genitals in great detail.

  • He Used Jumbo to Explain Vietnam

    He Used Jumbo to Explain Vietnam
    Photo: Yoichi Okamoto / Wikimedia Commons / Public Domain

    Once, Jumbo was called upon to serve the country in a time of great need, when words — even words from the POTUS — would simply not do. In a mercifully off-the-record moment at the height of America’s entanglement in Vietnam, reporters asked Johnson to explain, simply, “Why?” Unable to conjure a suitable answer, LBJ instead produced his veiny avatar.

    “This is why!” Johnson declared, presenting Jumbo to the press pool. 

  • He Liked Whipping His Genitalia Around In The Bathroom

    He Liked Whipping His Genitalia Around In The Bathroom
    Photo: Yoichi Okamoto / Wikimedia Commons / Public Domain

    As president, Johnson enjoyed displaying his member to colleagues, often wielding Jumbo in plain sight in bathrooms, “shaking it, as if he was showing off,” according to one harrowing account. “Have you ever seen anything as big as this?” he asked another man, which is quite trick question, especially coming from the president.

  • He Pulled His Member Out Wherever And Whenever To Urinate, Even in Front of Elected Officials

    He Pulled His Member Out Wherever And Whenever To Urinate, Even in Front of Elected Officials
    Photo: Yoichi Okamoto / Wikimedia Commons / Public Domain

    When need arose, Johnson urinated freely, wherever he happened to be and regardless of the company present. Sometimes, LBJ “seemed to want to be noticed” urinating, according to Rep. Wingate Lucas (D-TX), such as one occasion in the parking lot of the House Office Building.

    “I remember once, we were walking across the lot and some [female] secretaries were behind us, and [LBJ] just stopped and began to [urinate] right in front of them,” Lucas said. In a “one-room hideaway office” on the top floor of the House Office Building, Johnson would openly relieve himself in a sink in the corner while dictating to a secretary or even entertaining guests.

  • He Had His White House Shower Renovated To Include A Custom Nozzle For His Member

    He Had His White House Shower Renovated To Include A Custom Nozzle For His Member
    Photo: Unknown / Wikimedia Commons / Public Domain

    So steadfast was Johnson’s love for Jumbo, he had a special nozzle installed in the First Shower for cleaning Jumbo. LBJ reportedly wanted the custom floor nozzle aimed “directly at the president's [member]” and to have the force of a "fire hose." White House plumber Howard Arrington told Life LBJ’s special demands required significant changes to the infrastructure at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.

    "We ended up with four pumps, and then we had to increase the size of our water lines because other parts of the house were being sucked dry," Arrington said.

    It took years of tinkering and fine tuning, but Arrington and his team finally got it right. "One day the head usher tried out the shower. It pinned him right against the wall, and he looked like a lobster when he came out. 'I don't see how he can stand it,'" the usher said. President Nixon removed Johnson's custom nozzle when he took office in 1969.

  • He Readjusted Himself Constantly in Meetings

    He Readjusted Himself Constantly in Meetings
    Photo: Yoichi Okamoto / Wikimedia Commons / Public Domain

    Missouri Rep. Richard Bolling described LBJ as "Crude. Barnyard." According to Bolling, while in audience with anyone, regardless of the gender or position of those present, LBJ tugged adjusted himself constantly. "We men used to be a bit embarrassed," Bolling recalled