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Massage Therapists Describe Their Worst Customers  

Damon Davis
17.2k views 15 items

Swedish! Shiatsu! Toe! Yes, this little piggy wants a toe massage. And some clients make other odd requests or act in strange, creepy ways that do not endear them to massage therapists. 

The people who rub, knead, and pummel our knots and aches away for a living shared stories on Reddit about what it was like in the room with their worst customers. All the ethereal zen music and aromatic essential oils in the world couldn't make these experiences relaxing - for the massage therapist, anyway.

They Got Farted On - Then Blamed For It

From Reddit user /u/Classicrocker07:

A large female client wanted focus on her glutes. Needless to say, I was farted on while she was alseep.

Her own fart woke her up, and she then accused me of farting because there were trace amounts of fart still in the air.

They Had An Extremely Smelly Client

From Reddit user /u/purple_bee:

One of my biggest pet peeves is people that don't show up for their appointment or cancel 15 minutes before. People need to understand we get paid per massage, not hourly (unless you're in a spa). If you don't show up, we don't get paid. If you cancel 15 minutes before, we can't fill that space... so we don't get paid. It's much better if you just call and cancel!

My worst horror story... I can totally deal with a little bit of body odor, but this guy, holy sh*t, the entire clinic reaked of BO. When he took off his shirt, [it was] very obvious that this guy did not shower or change his clothes often - his singlet was covered in yellow stains. Worst massage I've ever done; I was almost gagging on the smell.

He booked again, to my horror, and I said, "Next time you come in I want you to have a nice hot shower... so that your muscles are nice and relaxed." Did he? No, he did not.

I asked him if he had showered, and he said, "Oh yeah, the other day." Cringe.

Oh yeah, and one of his skin things broke off and crumbled in my hand. Hands down worst day of my massage life.

His Client Grabbed Him Right Next To Her Husband

From Reddit user /u/xAvaricex:

Horror story: this not very attractive lady in her late 40s grabbed my junk during a couple's massage. With her husband on the adjacent table.

It was so awkward telling her, "Please stop. Keep your hands on the table, please."

Their Client Went In For A Kiss

From Reddit user /u/gabrielle612:

I've been a licensed massage therapist for four years now, and two weeks ago for the first time ever, I had an older man think it was okay to try to kiss me. I HAD TO PUSH HIM OFF OF ME.

I did not stop to think about his welfare, or him potentially suing my small practice. I only thought about my boundaries and my safety. After reestablishing my boundaries, I showed him the door.

Goodbye, creepy old man.