Culture
38 voters

Mom Jokes Even A Mother Could Love

Updated July 23, 2019 258 votes 38 voters25 items

List RulesVote up the jokes about moms and motherhood that are the funniest.

Moms do so much for us. It's only fair that we pay appreciation in the only way we know how: by providing you with a length list consisting of the best mom jokes of all time!

Before you go any further, you should know that you won't find any "Yo momma" jokes on this list. For one: it's no longer 2006. For another thing: this list opts for more variety among its joke structure. They're the perfect way to show your mom she raised a stand-up comedian. The next time you're over at her house, you can regale her with these jokes and puns, letting her know how much she means to you.

Sure, everyone is a fan of dad jokes. But mom jokes are just as good. They often deal with how mothers have so much to do. They work, clean the house, cook, and take care of kids. They're practically superhuman, and they definitely have a sense of humor about the roles they play in our lives.

Some of the best mom humor ever is on display right here. After going through the list, vote for the jokes that made you laugh the hardest. Whether or not you're a mom yourself, everyone can get a kick out of these bits.

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  • 1
    11
    6

    Why did mom chop the joke book in half?

    Mom said to cut the comedy.

  • 2
    9
    4

    What did the mommy bullet say to the daddy bullet?

    We're going to have a BB!

  • 3
    13
    10

    Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?

    Their kids have to play inside!

  • 4
    7
    2

    What do breastfeeding moms and stand-up comedians have in common?

    They'll both whip out their bits pretty much anywhere.

  • 5
    8
    4

    "Mom, stop. You never make jokes."

    "I made you."

  • 6
    7
    3

    Why is Mother’s Day before Father’s Day?

    So that the kids can spend all their Christmas money on mom.

  • 7
    11
    9

    What's the difference between a pack of cookies and a pack of elephants?

    You don't know? Then it's a good thing mom does the shopping!

  • 8
    6
    4

    How do you define "mother?"

    One person who does the work of 20 for free.

  • 9
    5
    9

    Why are computers so smart?

    They listen to their motherboards.

  • 10
    2
    6

    What is a sweater?

    Something you wear when your mother gets cold.

  • 11
    3
    8

    What did the mother rope say to her child?

    "Don't be knotty."

  • 12
    2
    6

    What is a minimum?

    A tiny mother.

  • 13
    2
    2

    What did the digital clock say to its mother?

    “Look, Ma! No hands!”

  • 14
    2
    6

    Why did the monster’s mother knit him three socks?

    He grew another foot!

  • 15
    2
    8

    What kind of mother forgets how old her kids are, can't remember the exact dates of their birthdays, and loves sending the kids away to sleepaway camp?

    My mother!

  • 16
    1
    2

    A police recruit was asked during the exam, "What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?"

    He said, "Call for backup."

  • 17
    1
    2

    Why did the mother cross the road?

    To get some peace and quiet!

  • 18
    2
    5

    "Mom, what's it like to have the greatest daughter in the world?"

    "I don't know. You'll have to ask your grandmother."

  • 19
    2
    5

    How come the mother needle got mad at the baby needle?

    It was way past its threadtime!

  • 20
    2
    5

    How many moms does it take to change a lightbulb?

    "Why do I have to do everything around here? Change your own darn lightbulb!"

  • 21
    2
    5

    What's the quickest way to spread a rumor?

    Tell your mom.

  • 22
    1
    5

    What kind of flowers are best for Mother’s Day?

    Mums.

  • 23
    1
    5

    Do you say prayers before eating?

    No, my mom's a good cook.

  • 24
    2
    8

    What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

    "Time to go to sweep."

  • 25
    0
    2

    What color flowers do mama cats like to get on Mother’s Day?

    Purr-ple flowers.