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The Most Lovable TV Alcoholics

Updated November 6, 2017 13.3k votes 2.8k voters 332.2k views31 items
"The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk they're sober."


   --William Butler Yeats.


These are some of our favorite, most lovable TV drunks. Famous drunks: cartoon characters, ad men, a shoe salesman, even a kindergarten teacher – they are all proof that it's OK to enjoy the results of a good fermentation process. This list of alcoholic TV characters includes some of the greatest TV characters of all time, because hey, boozehounds are people too. Vote for your favorite drunk TV characters and see if you recognize all of the TV alcoholics on this list. 
Photo:
  • Video: YouTube

    TV's most beer-crazed lovable teddy bear, Norm Peterson is a man of few words but with a strong appetite for the brew. This show takes place in a bar... AND HE IS ALWAYS THERE.

    Watch the video to the left to see Norm and Cliff sing some sparkling renditions of "Lollipop."

    BEST OF NORM QUOTES
     

    SAM: What do you know there, Norm?
    NORM: How to sit. How to drink. Want to quiz me?

    SAM: What'd you like, Normie?
    NORM: A reason to live. Give me another beer.

    WOODY: How's it going, Mr. Peterson?
    NORM: Poor.
    WOODY: I'm sorry to hear that.
    NORM: No, I mean pour.

    WOODY: How would a beer feel, Mr. Peterson?
    NORM: Pretty nervous if I was in the room.

    SAM: What's new, Normie?
    NORM: Terrorists, Sam. They've taken over my stomach and they're demanding beer.

    WOODY: What's going on, Mr. Peterson?
    NORM: The question is what's going in Mr. Peterson? A beer please, Woody.

    WOODY: Hey, Mr. Peterson, what's up?
    NORM: The warranty on my liver.

    COACH: What would you say to a beer, Normie?
    NORM: Daddy wuvs you.
    • Series: Cheers
    • Actor: George Wendt
    408
    228
    Lovable or not?
  • Photo: Wikimedia Commons / CC-BY

    Aside from a brief stint of sobriety that afforded Barney the opportunity to pilot a helicopter (among other things), Homer J Simpson's best bud is a RAGING alcoholic. He's sucked the taps at Moe's, drank from pooled beer on the street, and even produced an award-winning movie about his alcoholism (Pukahontas).

    Some of Barney's better quotes on alcohol:

    "In case you get hungry, there's an open beer in the fridge."

    "Moe, I've come here to make amends for my disgraceful behaviour over the last twenty years...I broke barstools, befouled your broom closet, and made sweet love to your pool table, which I then befouled."
    • Series: The Simpsons
    • Actor: Dan Castellaneta
    457
    255
    Lovable or not?
  • A fan of "Girlie Girl" beer, Al once held a meeting of NO MA'AM (National Organization of Men Against Amazonian Masterhood) when Yoko Ono appeared on the beer's label. 
    • Series: Married... with Children
    • Actor: Ed O'Neill
    • Episode: Top of the Heap
    405
    253
    Lovable or not?
  • "I am the liquor"

    Jim Lahey is the supervisor of Sunnyvale Trailer Park on the hit Canadian TV series "Trailer Park Boys"  and is the series' main antagonist. In his youth, Lahey was an idealistic police officer; but since his wrongful dismissal as a result of a prank by Julian, Ricky, and Bubbles on Halloween 1977, he degenerated into a bitter alcoholic. Nonetheless, Lahey has devoted himself to making Sunnyvale a better place to live, accompanied by his devoted assistant Randy.

    • Series: Trailer Park Boys
    • Actor: John Dunsworth
    422
    196
    Lovable or not?