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18 Terrible Movies Based on Stupid Properties That Nobody Cared About

Updated April 16, 2021 3.3k votes 614 voters 21.4k views18 items

List RulesVote up the films adapted from the silliest sources, be they board games, apps, toys, or plotless video games.

If there was one genre of film that the world could do without, it would be movies based on stupid things like board games, apps, and action figures. The films are rarely good and they're rarely financially successful, so why do movie studios keep licensing these properties? Maybe it’s easier to create a film with a built-in fanbase than it is to start from scratch. But even with that in mind, films based on toys and the like are usually garbage. The best you can hope for when you go to see a movie that’s nothing more than a secret commercial is something so transcendently bad that you don’t regret spending your hard-earned cash to watch a 90-minute ad.

The rash of films based on board games is particularly upsetting. The only film that managed to make it out of the board game ghetto when any dignity is Clue, and even that madcap piece of comedic genius has its detractors. The cynicism that it takes to make a film based off of a board game or a video game with no real narrative usually infuses the film with a silent hate for its audience, and viewers can feel that. So the next time you’re trying to figure out what to see on a Friday night, please don’t go see a movie based on a card game. It will only make you feel worse.

Vote up the movies that were bad ideas from the start, the films that adapted "material" never meant for adaptation.

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    It was a Herculean effort to pick just one Uwe Boll film to include on this list, but Alone in the Dark takes the cake. Not only does this picture shove aside what made the game so super scary, but it misses the point of the game entirely. Boll's film eschews any sort of tone in favor of bland sci-fi action and effects that would make a Mudvayne video snicker. 

    As poorly as Alone in the Dark was received, it did manage to sweep the "Stinkers Bad Movie Awards" in 2005. 

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    Despite spending the late '80s and early '90s as a basic side scrolling game, the Super Mario franchise could conceivably offer a handful of jumping off points for interesting stories, but the 1993 film follows none of them. Instead, the filmmakers go rogue and try to tell a gritty sci-fi story that is nonsensical even for a movie about a plumber who eats mushrooms to turn into a giant. 

    If you weren't aware, this is considered one of the worst video game adaptations ever - which is saying something when you think about all the stinkers Uwe Boll has made. According to the film's star, Bob Hoskins, self-medicating with alcohol was absolutely necessary to make it through the production.

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    Even in the '90s, $30 million wasn't what it used to be. While it's a staggering amount of money for any individual think about, it wasn't enough to make Wing Commander's outer space battles look like anything more than Star Wars test footage.

    So what if no one watched the movie in the theater? It still has a fervent cult following right? No, no it does not. 

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    If you've somehow managed to scrape your brain of this abysmal take on the senselessly fun Double Dragon games, sorry that you have to think about Scott Wolf again. While the game is an arcade beat 'em up classic that's endlessly enjoyable, it's also a side scroller built on approximately zero plot and doesn't exactly boast any iconography or mythology that demands adapting.

    Its 8% rating on Rotten Tomatoes is a testament to just how much of a flaming car crash Double Dragon is as a movie.

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