Total Nerd Movies Everyone Else Loved And I HATED  

analise.dubner
23.1k views 9 items Embed
Sorry, consensus. You are WRONG about these films.

1
The English Patient is listed (or ranked) 1 on the list Movies Everyone Else Loved And I HATED
The English Patient Willem Dafoe, Ralph Fiennes, Colin Firth I'm SO with Elaine Bennis on this one. Thank god I watched it on DVD so I could pause it during its 9 hour run to get up and revive myself with a few baseball bats to the head a few times. Then I could splash some cold water in my face, shake it off, and grimly return to the couch so I could figure out why everyone was having a religious experience over this movie.

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2
Forrest Gump is listed (or ranked) 2 on the list Movies Everyone Else Loved And I HATED
Forrest Gump Tom Hanks, Kurt Russell, Sally Field I didn't see this when everyone else did. I was too turned off by all the worship. Instead I waited till DVD and promptly slit my wrists from the hokey, manipulative bulls**t of the filmmaking.

3
The Sixth Sense is listed (or ranked) 3 on the list Movies Everyone Else Loved And I HATED
The Sixth Sense Bruce Willis, Mischa Barton, Haley Joel Osment This was a fun movie, right up to the point where I was horrified to learn that he had CHEATED to get his stupid twist at the end. BOOOOOOOOOOOO. CHEATER!

4
Requiem for a Dream is listed (or ranked) 4 on the list Movies Everyone Else Loved And I HATED
Requiem for a Dream Jennifer Connelly, Jared Leto, Ellen Burstyn You know what I hate? A filmmaker who thinks he's too good for his audience.

5
The Perfect Storm is listed (or ranked) 5 on the list Movies Everyone Else Loved And I HATED
The Perfect Storm George Clooney, Mark Wahlberg, Diane Lane

Waaaaaaave to the lighthaouse keepah's kid...

... oh, and also to Diane Lane's giant, disembodied head floating over the waves in the end.

6
As Good as It Gets is listed (or ranked) 6 on the list Movies Everyone Else Loved And I HATED
As Good as It Gets Jack Nicholson, Helen Hunt, Julie Benz I f**king hate JACK. And also, Helen Hunt. Put em together... have this movie get all slobbered over by the critics and you have a recipe for me to hate. So, I admit that I'm probably not giving it a fair shake, but I still hated it. Hated the characters. Hated the fact that I was never getting those two hours back.

7
Leaving Las Vegas is listed (or ranked) 7 on the list Movies Everyone Else Loved And I HATED
Leaving Las Vegas Nicolas Cage, Mariska Hargitay, Elisabeth Shue I guess people love watching other people destruct on screen. I don't. And when it starts to get self indulgent and minpulative? I REALLY don't.

8
Dancer in the Dark is listed (or ranked) 8 on the list Movies Everyone Else Loved And I HATED
Dancer in the Dark Björk, Catherine Deneuve, David Morse

Lars Von Trier. Dogma.

HATE.

I would have listed ALL his pretentious bulls**t films here, but they don't really fall into this list category, since no one has seen any of them.

9
Independence Day is listed (or ranked) 9 on the list Movies Everyone Else Loved And I HATED
Independence Day Will Smith, Jeff Goldblum, Vivica A. Fox This one almost doesn't belong here. I didn't really hate, hate it. It kind of doesn't deserve to be hated, its just a popcorn flick. But because so many people seem to think it's great cinema, that's the only reason it's here. Someone has to take a stand. And that's me. With my Mac laptop... against the mothership of Roland Emmerich/Dean Devlin.