Days without food and water, record breaking high temperatures, no shelter, and lack of sleep. No, we’re not talking about a prison camp; we’re talking about attending your average music festival.
Festivals like Coachella and Bonnaroo can be a blast- an insane party with your best friends and all your favorite bands. But they can also be a cesspool of body fluid, mud, and empty water bottles. Like life, music festivals are what you make them. Personally, we’re grossed out by the thought of rubbing up against 60,000 half naked twenty-somethings who are strung out on molly, but different strokes for different folks. Maybe you’re into drinking $50 water and binging on fried dough for three days in the heat. If that’s the case, then you’re really going to like our list of the biggest music festival clichés.
This list of music festival clichés isn’t just about the tie-dyed dummies you’ll inevitably spend the weekend sharing tent space and dance room with. It’s about all the horrible things that the festival inundates you with hour after hour, minute after minute. At a music festival, if the high ticket prices and expensive water don’t get you, the heat stroke and disgusting port-a-potties will. So save your money and stay home. If you find yourself experiencing FOMO when all your friends are there and you aren't, this list of the worst music festival clichés will help you feel better about skipping the action.Vote up which music festival cliché you hate the most. Then leave us a comment about which one you’re least looking forward to dealing with (although, we’re pretty sure it’s the toilets).
Your Favorite Artists Are All Playing at the Same Time
Someone Will Be Wearing a Completely Idiotic T-Shirt
Water Costs Roughly $75
Awful Security Will Annoy You
Lines for the Bathroom Will Become the Real Life Hunger Games
You'll Never Stop Sweating
Finding Somewhere to Camp Is Excruciating
Overly Complicated Costumes Will Block Your View
Parking Is a Joke
Watching Your Favorite Band Means Sitting Through Five Acts You Hate
Trying to Find Your Friends is Literally Impossible
You're Going to Lose Your Stuff
Traffic Will Make You Want to Kill Yourself
You Won't Be Able to Sleep and You'll Lose Your Mind
The Dust Will Come for You
The Performances Might Suck
Crowd Surfers and Hula Hoopers Will Make You Hate Humankind
It's Always a Million Degrees Outside
Your Shoes WILL Die
Your Phone Will Definitely Die
So. Much. Mud.
Everyone Is Drunk or Hallucinating or High
You'll Get Sick on Gross Festival Food
You'll Get a Beautiful Sunburn as a Souvenir
Trying to Figure Out Who's on the Lineup Requires a PhD