Updated November 9, 2022 246.0K votes 17.8K voters 5.3M views
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Vote Up The Toys That Couldn't Be Made Today
Kids toys and action figures have always been big business. Sometimes they are massive franchises that spawn billion dollar movies and decades of merchandise and enjoyment for kids and adults alike. Other times... well, they completely miss the mark. Ranker Comics has visited this island of misfit figures and collected a list of bizarre, obscure and ridiculous action figures from our youth.
Sure, there were the big money makers: He-Man, Transformers, G.I. Joe, Power Rangers. Then there are the imitators to the throne: M.A.S.K., VR Troopers, CORPS, Thundercats. These doppelgangers only lasted for a brief time and many found homes stowed away in the collections of the the bigger brands. We should dust these little plastic warriors off and celebrate their weirdness! Then there was the big comics of the 1990s where any and every comic book title was optioned for a toy line and cartoon combo. Some of these titles and characters no longer exist but their molded plastic forms remain, like an ancient trophy to a once powerful reign. Of course, the real money was in the tsunami of action and science fiction films, that were immortalized with brief action figure toy lines - even if the film is questionable in its marketing towards kids.
So stand proud, Biker Mice from Mars, Toxic Crusaders and Beetleborgs! Although you might have ended up in the neighborhood garage sale years ago, alongside some of the most dangerous '90s toys parents couldn't wait to get rid of, Ranker Comics has not forgotten your epic playtime battles! Noble readers, enjoy this meticulous collection of collectibles that are sure to stir a few memories and may make you want to revisit that dusty box in the attic!
Unless you were around for the animated series that explained this feline-infused He-Man franchise, it's hard to look at these figures and not ask, "WTF?". The Thundercat figures have aged nicely, becoming popular collector items among those nostalgic for even the strangest of their favorite shows.
Now, The Real Ghostbusters are not to be confused with the popular Bill Murray movie Ghostbusters or the slightly worse Ghostbusters 2. The Real Ghostbusters was a cartoon that was spun from the film Ghostbusters, which barely resembled the movie or its actors at all. The cartoon was a massive hit and spawned an expansive toy line with tons of figures, monsters and vehicles - including a mess of play action toys that allowed kids to shoot Ghostbuster-like weapons.
Every kid in the 90s had one of these rubbery, grinning, Street Sharks hiding in their bedroom. Of course there was also a TV show to set up the Street Sharks toy line, but it's clear that with as unique as these toys were, the concept to the figure came before the storyline. Which one was your favorite? We loved the 'extreme' tiger shark with roller blades!
We think every kid had one of these mini statues buried and mangled at the bottom of their toy chest. The Spawn figures always looked AMAZING - tons of tiny details and paint decos. However, what they had in looks they lost in their play factor. That, and they always looked like they were from the pits of Hell, which makes it a little awkward when Spawn is hanging out with The Real Ghostbusters.
Although Small Soldiers struggled to find an audience, you just know they had to make a toy line to go with it. Although these figures didn't come to life and attempt to kill you like in the kids movie it's based on, the toys did utilize newer technology and didn't rely on previous toy line gimmicks.
As part of a popular ad campaign surrounding car safety and seatbelts, the Crash Test Dummies became household names. To capitalize on this success, a TV show and toy line was created. The toys were actually very cool - the Dummies were given a legion of junkyard-themed villains and each Dummy would explode with a special button on their chest was pressed. They even got a Crash Test Car at would become absolutely totaled when slammed into a wall!
Unless you were around for the animated series that explained this feline-infused He-Man franchise, it's hard to look at these figures and not ask, "WTF?". The Thundercat figures have aged nicely, becoming popular collector items among those nostalgic for even the strangest of their favorite shows.
Every kid in the 90s had one of these rubbery, grinning, Street Sharks hiding in their bedroom. Of course there was also a TV show to set up the Street Sharks toy line, but it's clear that with as unique as these toys were, the concept to the figure came before the storyline. Which one was your favorite? We loved the 'extreme' tiger shark with roller blades!
