Mike the Coffeehouse Guy
"I knew a guy named Mike who ran a coffeehouse. It was a pretty hip place, kinda beatnik, live music, poetry readings, open mic nights. But something about him was just a little bit off. He stared at you too long when making eye contact, girls all hated him and were completely creeped out by him. He had long hair, a beard, and drove a van. Just kinda generally creepy. "His favorite jokes were of the 'Whatcha doing later, Mike?' 'Cutting up hookers and shoving them in dumpsters' vein of humor.
"After about a year, he sold the coffeehouse to a friend, and I ended up managing it. Business picked up pretty quick after word got out that Mike wasn't around anymore. The place was really starting to turn a profit, everything was going great. Then he started hanging out every now and then, and being extra creepy. Leering at teenage girls, and just kinda being generally inappropriate. I asked him not to come back, and it got kinda ugly.
"I knew a guy named Mike who ran a coffeehouse. It was a pretty hip place, kinda beatnik, live music, poetry readings, open mic nights. But something about him was just a little bit off. He stared at you too long when making eye contact, girls all hated him and were completely creeped out by him. He had long hair, a beard, and drove a van. Just kinda generally creepy.
"His favorite jokes were of the 'Whatcha doing later, Mike?' 'Cutting up hookers and shoving them in dumpsters' vein of humor.
"Fast forward about four years, and I'm sitting on my couch, watching TV. The local news comes on, and his face pops up on screen. He had been arrested for raping and torturing three separate women. He was found behind a shopping center with a woman shackled in the back of his van, and he had been driving around all night tazering and raping her. He's currently serving three consecutive life sentences."
Shane the Creep, and Bonus Brother Creep
"I was 13, hanging out with my friends all day, every day. At some point, this guy started hanging out with us. I don't know who he was friends with first, or where he came from - one day he was just there. His name was Shane. Shane looked a lot like David Schwimmer...if David Schwimmer had more acne than bare skin... and was the product of generations of inbreeding. Shane said he was 16. Shane started hitting on me pretty heavily. It got to the point where I couldn't hang out with my friends, because he was constantly there, and constantly saying gross things to me (telling dirty jokes about himself or describing himself sexually). What's worse, my friends kept trying to get me to accept his advances, because it wasn't like anyone else was interested in me :("
Then he became friends with my brother, and would come over to our apartment frequently. One night, I came home to find him sitting on our couch next to my mom. She said he'd said he was a friend of mine, and she was showing him baby pictures of me, class projects, etc.
So... it actually just stopped about as suddenly as it started. He just disappeared one day. That is when I found out that when he would be in our apartment with my brother, he would mostly ask my brother about me, and my brother frequently let him into my room. He went through all my papers, looking for some mention of him, apparently. He also broke into a locked book he thought was a diary.
Also, he was not actually 16. He told my brother he was 19. Right before he left, he changed the number again - to 26.
"A guy I briefly dated in high school. At first I thought he was awkward and charming. But then I visited his bedroom and there were pictures of me sleeping attached to his ceiling."
"My former roommate (28 year old DJ) had a best friend (male, late 50's) who went by the name 'Lobo'. I thought it odd that his best friend was so much older, but never really thought about why or how he got that name. Unfortunately, I found out when all kinds of creepy stuff started happening around the house. I'm talking real-life creepy here. Shadows and floating orb-like things would appear and disappear; uneasy feelings when walking by a particular bedroom door; my five year-old suddenly started having night-terrors; friends would stop talking and get creeped out whenever Lobo walked in the house, whether we actually saw him or not. Roommate would tell me things like he and Lobo would go out into the woods at night and burn things, like idols, to the one they worshipped. When he asked me one night if I'd ever read this certain book, I said, 'No'. So he got it for me to read when I had time. It was a black Satanic Bible. Those two could do weird things to people. I had a bad burn once from a popcorn popper on my arm. He asked about it, touched it, and within hours it was healed up. No scar. He finally freaked me the fuck out so bad I had to leave. I didn't tell him where I moved to. Four weeks after I'd moved in, I came home from work to find them sitting in my driveway. 'Just visiting,' they said."
#67 on The Best Comic Book Villains