Unlike obnoxious classmates or mouth-breathing coworkers, your creepiest family members are always just one Thanksgiving or family reunion away from telling you with their words and eyes how "grown up" you look. Blood is thicker than water, but not as thick as the tension between you and your flat-earther cousin. All humor aside, a few creepy relatives have dark family secrets that make them more than just a joke.
Taking to Reddit, people shared their strangest relatives, both of the immediate and the extended variety. Some strange family members come across as monsters, others just a little misguided, but all of them likely think their relatives are the weird ones.
No Love For This Cousin
From Redditor /u/fatalcosplays:
My male cousin not only admitted to molesting me most of my life but also is now in jail for r*ping a baby. I never said anything because I knew his side of the family wouldn't believe me. They still think he's innocent, despite the fact that he admitted to r*ping the child.
A Real Monster Here
From Redditor /u/atducker:
I had a r(pist uncle. He's dead now. R*ped his mom. R*ped his aunt. R*ped his sister. That's just the ones we know about. My family refused to ever do anything about it. I was just telling my wife that I'm glad he's dead now because I no longer have to worry about keeping him away from my wife and kids. They never met him and they never will. He's dust now.
The darkest part of it all is that it happened while my grandfather was there, and there's no way he didn't know about it. He just pretended he didn't know and still treated my uncle as his son up until he died from drinking too much a few years ago. My mom is pretty messed up about it all and so is my aunt. My grandmother is dead now. My mom worked through some stuff when my uncle was dying and talks about forgiveness, but I don't really know how she feels for real about it.
Throw Out This In-Law
From Redditor /u/politecrank:
My sister's ex-husband. When I was young, we were super close, and I thought of him as my brother. My sister is nine years my senior, and he is 12 years older than her. The first wildly inappropriate thing he did was when I was 11. We were playing around with my baby nephew, and he started to tickle the both of us. He wouldn't stop so I eventually bit his shoulder in defense. He immediately got up and walked out of the room. He came back and said, "Unless you want me to give you another nephew, you shouldn't bite me." He later told my sister that my 11-year-old self biting him gave him a raging b*ner which made my sister pissed off at me (as if I knew biting was sexual at 11).
Fast-forward to freshman year of high school. Mom kicked me out (we had a complicated relationship) so I moved in with my sister. My brother-in-law began to climb into bed with me in the morning before work. Nothing sexual went on, but it was super creepy. He would whisper, "Good morning," in my ear, stroke my hair, and kiss my forehead. This happened on an almost daily basis and always made me uncomfortable.
Fast-forward a few more years and a few more red flag moments I brushed off. My sister moved out of state. Right after my 18th birthday I went to visit. My sister was working the night shift so my bro-in-law picked me up from the airport. I had a long flight, so I went into the guest room to catch some sleep. My nephew crawled into bed with me. I woke up because my back hurt from the plane ride. I started to doze back off, but not completely. I woke back up to my brother-in-law standing next to the bed groping me and rubbing himself through his shorts. He tried to shove his hand down my pants. "Please just let me touch you. Please I want to touch you just this once." Keep in mind his young child was sleeping next to me. He then begged me to sleep with him. I hopped out of bed and went outside to get away from him and have a smoke to calm down because I was freaking out. He finds me outside, backs me into a corner and wont let me past him until I promise not to tell my sister. My sister can be a raging b*tch, and I was scared she wouldn't believe me, so I didn't, but I did tell my mom the next day because I didn't want to be left alone with him (she lived there at the time too). My mom ended up telling her anyway. Turns out he cheated on her, so they hadn't slept together in months except for the times he forced her. Literally pinned her down and forced her. They got divorced pretty soon after, but he still says I imagined the whole thing, him cornering me outside and all.
I loved the sh*t out of him growing up. I had a bad relationship with my mom and my sister, and he was the only one who was nice to me. I felt so betrayed by him knowing that the whole time he was likely waiting for me to come of legal age so he could try to take advantage of me. He obviously thought so little of me that he thought I would sleep with my sister's husband and then had the audacity to call me a liar to everyone in the family.
Turning Down Requests For Cuddles
From Redditor /u/looktothesky13:
My biological uncle Troy. I've only met him a few times, but goddamn he's creepy. He got mad when my mom (who was married to my adoptive father) wouldn't snuggle with him, that I wouldn't tell him when my period was, and when I told him that my five-year-old sister couldn't hang out with him alone (she's no relation of his).