Howdy y’all, how well do you think you know your down home Texan slang? Are you a three jump cowboy when it comes to the idiosyncrasies and nuances of Texas lingo? Or do you carry your brains in your back pocket? The things they say in Texas have a musical quality unto themselves, and the terminology can have disastrous outcomes when used out of context. If you’re planning on going to the Lone Star state any time soon, you’ll want to study up on this Texan glossary so the locals don’t think you’re as useless as two buggies in a one horse town.
Once you get the hang of these Texan phrases, try them out on your friends before you run your shiny new Texas slang on any locals that you might come across when you hit the panhandle. The last thing you want to do is start an argument about Texan lingo with someone from Texas. All of these phrases were passed down through generations of families who actually talk like this, and who still use a lot of these phrases. It doesn’t matter if you’re eating barbecue in Brownwood or going to a crust show in San Antonio, someone is going to talk about “rasin’ cane,” or how it’s “hot as a pot of neck bones.” Texas is a magnificent state with a collection of traditions and colloquialisms that mutate and recycle with every new generation.
Vote up the words and phrases that are the most unique to Texans and what you believe TRUE Texans should be familiar with.
To throw a meaner tantrum than a two dollar rattle snake.
This is a promise to get something done come hell or high water.
This means that someone is so broke that they have to go to the bathroom on the street, sans pot.
The utmost conceivable degree of something. As in, "This pie is as good as all git-out."
Being rambunctious, loud, or having a much better time than anyone else.
This phrase is used when there's something so good that you can't pass it up.
Meaning: The idea that you're floating doesn't making sense or your excuse won't work.
This comes from a phrase that plenty of parents used on their kids before whipping them with a tree branch, and it means that you have to pick your punishment. You would use this when deciding which bill to pay first.
When someone is "all hat and no cattle" they have no idea what they're talking about.
This doesn't refer to your height, but rather your age. Most people were "knee high to a grasshopper" when they were 2 or 3. Before then they were "down to an ant's ankle."
When you're so busy that you don't have time to rest because of everything you have to do.
Otherwise known as a sunshower, or when rain falls while the sun is shining.
It gets hotter than a two dollar pistol in Texas, and on those long days when the sun is baring down on the promised land you might find yourself needing a glass of water lest you find yourself with the driest mouth in the panhandle.
Use this to describe someone who's kind of dumb.
To have a permanent or temporary limp.
A cheap gun is usually a black market item, meaning that it's "hot." So when something is hotter than that pistol it's big news.
To be in tall cotton means to be living at the peak of your life, it's like "salad days," but softer.
Used to describe someone who is a liar or a thief. Or someone who is actually shaped like a dog's back leg.
If someone has said this about you they think you're useless. Sorry.
This phrase is used to describe someone who's so afraid of everything that they wouldn't do something as simple and chill as biting into a pillowy buttermilk biscuit.
Puking your guts out. When you've had too many cold ones while chewing the rag you'll probably find yourself calling for Earl.
Meaning: There's no problem that can't be resolved by someone who sets their mind to accomplishing their goals.
To chat as if you have nothing but time on your hands.
Boomtowns were notorious for setting up one week and being gone the next. Because of that, their eating establishments were lax on everything from service to the actual food. You'd have to as brave as a ten gallon hat to eat in one of those diners.
You would use this when you have two very different problems on your hands, be they a drought and a broken TV, or literally two buckets of possums.