language 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand  

Jacob Shelton
1.8k votes 193 voters 10.3k views 25 items Embed

List Rules Vote up the words and phrases that are the most unique to Texans and what you believe TRUE Texans should be familiar with.

Howdy y’all, how well do you think you know your down home Texan slang? Are you a three jump cowboy when it comes to the idiosyncrasies and nuances of Texas lingo? Or do you carry your brains in your back pocket? The things they say in Texas have a musical quality unto themselves, and the terminology can have disastrous outcomes when used out of context. If you’re planning on going to the Lone Star state any time soon, you’ll want to study up on this Texan glossary so the locals don’t think you’re as useless as two buggies in a one horse town.

Once you get the hang of these Texan phrases, try them out on your friends before you run your shiny new Texas slang on any locals that you might come across when you hit the panhandle. The last thing you want to do is start an argument about Texan lingo with someone from Texas. All of these phrases were passed down through generations of families who actually talk like this, and who still use a lot of these phrases. It doesn’t matter if you’re eating barbecue in Brownwood or going to a crust show in San Antonio, someone is going to talk about “rasin’ cane,” or how it’s “hot as a pot of neck bones.” Texas is a magnificent state with a collection of traditions and colloquialisms that mutate and recycle with every new generation.

Vote up the words and phrases that are the most unique to Texans and what you believe TRUE Texans should be familiar with. 

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Pitch a Hissy Fit is listed (or ranked) 1 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
Pitch a Hissy Fit

To throw a meaner tantrum than a two dollar rattle snake. 

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Come Hell or High Water is listed (or ranked) 2 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
Come Hell or High Water

This is a promise to get something done come hell or high water.

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Doesn’t Have a Pot to Piss In is listed (or ranked) 3 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
Doesn’t Have a Pot to Piss In

This means that someone is so broke that they have to go to the bathroom on the street, sans pot.

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Raising Cane is listed (or ranked) 4 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
Raising Cane

Being rambunctious, loud, or having a much better time than anyone else. 

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All Git-Out is listed (or ranked) 5 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
All Git-Out

The utmost conceivable degree of something. As in, "This pie is as good as all git-out."

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You Can’t Beat That with a Sti... is listed (or ranked) 6 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
You Can’t Beat That with a Stick

This phrase is used when there's something so good that you can't pass it up. 

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Knee High to a Grasshopper is listed (or ranked) 7 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
Knee High to a Grasshopper

This doesn't refer to your height, but rather your age. Most people were "knee high to a grasshopper" when they were 2 or 3. Before then they were "down to an ant's ankle." 

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All Hat and No Cattle is listed (or ranked) 8 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
All Hat and No Cattle

When someone is "all hat and no cattle" they have no idea what they're talking about. 

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Pick Your Switch is listed (or ranked) 9 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
Pick Your Switch

This comes from a phrase that plenty of parents used on their kids before whipping them with a tree branch, and it means that you have to pick your punishment. You would use this when deciding which bill to pay first. 

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That Dog Don't Hunt is listed (or ranked) 10 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
That Dog Don't Hunt

Meaning: The idea that you're floating doesn't making sense or your excuse won't work. 

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Busy as a One-Legged Man at an... is listed (or ranked) 11 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
Busy as a One-Legged Man at an Ass-Kicking Contest

When you're so busy that you don't have time to rest because of everything you have to do. 

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So Dry I’m Spitting Cotton is listed (or ranked) 12 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
So Dry I’m Spitting Cotton

It gets hotter than a two dollar pistol in Texas, and on those long days when the sun is baring down on the promised land you might find yourself needing a glass of water lest you find yourself with the driest mouth in the panhandle.

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The Devil is Beating His Wife is listed (or ranked) 13 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
The Devil is Beating His Wife

Otherwise known as a sunshower, or when rain falls while the sun is shining. 

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Hot as a Two Dollar Pistol is listed (or ranked) 14 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
Hot as a Two Dollar Pistol

A cheap gun is usually a black market item, meaning that it's "hot." So when something is hotter than that pistol it's big news. 

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A Few Pickles Short of a Barre... is listed (or ranked) 15 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
A Few Pickles Short of a Barrel

Use this to describe someone who's kind of dumb. 

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Hitch in His Gitalong is listed (or ranked) 16 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
Hitch in His Gitalong

To have a permanent or temporary limp. 

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In Tall Cotton is listed (or ranked) 17 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
In Tall Cotton

To be in tall cotton means to be living at the peak of your life, it's like "salad days," but softer. 

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Crooked as a Dog’s Hind Leg. is listed (or ranked) 18 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
Crooked as a Dog’s Hind Leg.

Used to describe someone who is a liar or a thief. Or someone who is actually shaped like a dog's back leg. 

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Like a Drum with a Hole In It.... is listed (or ranked) 19 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
Like a Drum with a Hole In It. . .

If someone has said this about you they think you're useless. Sorry.

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They Wouldn’t Bite a Biscuit is listed (or ranked) 20 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
They Wouldn’t Bite a Biscuit

This phrase is used to describe someone who's so afraid of everything that they wouldn't do something as simple and chill as biting into a pillowy buttermilk biscuit. 

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Calling for Earl is listed (or ranked) 21 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
Calling for Earl

Puking your guts out. When you've had too many cold ones while chewing the rag you'll probably find yourself calling for Earl.

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Chaw the Rag is listed (or ranked) 22 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
Chaw the Rag

To chat as if you have nothing but time on your hands. 

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No Hill for a Stepper is listed (or ranked) 23 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
No Hill for a Stepper

Meaning: There's no problem that can't be resolved by someone who sets their mind to accomplishing their goals. 

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Brave Enough to Eat in a Boomt... is listed (or ranked) 24 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
Brave Enough to Eat in a Boomtown Cafe

Boomtowns were notorious for setting up one week and being gone the next. Because of that, their eating establishments were lax on everything from service to the actual food. You'd have to as brave as a ten gallon hat to eat in one of those diners. 

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Two Different Buckets of Possu... is listed (or ranked) 25 on the list 19 Phrases Only True Texans Understand
Two Different Buckets of Possums

You would use this when you have two very different problems on your hands, be they a drought and a broken TV, or literally two buckets of possums.