The world is a cruel place, but it's significantly crueler after the apocalypse. That's part of the reason post-apocalyptic sci-fi is so interesting. The best post-apocalyptic movies are a thrill ride, but most of us can admit we'd probably have died in the first 30 seconds. Let's be real: can you really hold in a sneeze for all eternity in order to escape the fate of anyone who makes a sound in A Quiet Place. Would you even want to? Would you not have just raised up your arms and said screw it when the world was ending for the second in The 100 after you've already rebuilt society from a total nuclear meltdown once before? Not everyone is cracked up to survive in a post-apocalyptic world. Sometimes, the fight just doesn't seem worth it, but other times your Zodiac sign could give you a leg up.
Picture this: you're dumped into the center of a giant, ever-changing maze where death lurks at every corner. You wake up with no memory of your former life, but you know you have to get out of there alive. Luckily, you're an Aries (March 21 – April 19). Aries possess an immense sense of leadership and fearlessness – exactly the traits you need to make it out of The Maze Runner alive. With this kind of personality, you can band together with your peers and figure out your next move. Of course, when danger lurks behind every turn, you're going to have to be brave. Luckily, no one is braver.
There's one major reason a Taurus (April 20 – May 20) would undoubtedly survive The Hunger Games, and that's because they'd be hanging out in the Capitol with all the weird wigs and fancy foods. Taurus is not a commoner and adores the finer things in life. Yes, they may be hard-working but only if the people around them make them uncomfortable enough (i.e. you're going to fight back if the peons from the various districts threaten your luxe way of life).
Taurus is stubborn as heck and wavers between wildly relaxed and ready to attack. This type of personality makes them well suited to enjoy the spoils of Panem and train the kids in the Hunger Games in one single breath. They crave stability, and probably wouldn't do so well toughing it out in the districts. Luckily, they don't have to worry about that until Katniss flips the whole thing on its head.
Gemini (May 21 – June 20) are constantly looking for their other half. They have strong opinions, are totally spontaneous and sometimes feel a need to be the center of attention. This is why Geminis are a slam-dunk for the post-apocalyptic purgatory in Wristcutters: A Love Story.
The Wristcutters' post-apocalyptic world is built for the spontaneous and hot-headed. It's where the worst traits of a Gemini flourish. Everyone in this world got there by committing suicide (or at least a suicide-adjacent act like accidentally overdosing on drugs). Eugene was so angered by not being the center of attention that he electrocuted himself on stage (certainly not the best quality of a Gemini). Fortunately, it was Zia's desire for companionship that helped him and Mikal escape after finding The People In Charge. If Geminis band together, anything is possible. Plus, who doesn't love a Tom Waits cameo?
It takes a Cancer's (June 21 – July 22) compassion to save the planet when the entire world has stopped caring and decided to destroy it with trash, but then there's WALL-E. Unlike a typical robot, WALL-E led with empathy and kindness to break down the barriers of a culture that no longer cared about anything happening outside of their screens. They couldn't form a real human connection, but WALL-E saw around this.
Much like a Cancer's hard exterior, WALL-E was crafted from layers of tough metal. Underneath, he was as emotional and empathic – a trait all Cancers share. He notoriously advocated for his loved ones (like when he mistook EVE's maintenance for torture and tried to save her) because friends and family are the center of a Cancer's world. Beyond that, WALL-E spends much of the film nurturing a tiny plant and Cancers are the nurturers of the Zodiac. Really, no one else cared for the little plant that much or the planet wouldn't have been coated in a thick layer of garbage.
By the last Mad Max film, civilization has crumbled and the few survivors are enslaved inside the Citadel by a deranged tyrant. It takes a tough-as-heck Charlize Theron to escape. Even in the very first film, Max had to be really, really mad to drive across the world's gigantic barren wasteland and seek out revenge on the motorcycle gang that killed his family. If there's anyone who's going to hack that kind of mission, it's a Leo (July 23 – August 22).
Leos are the leaders of the Zodiac. They are courageous and brave. Their sense of leadership almost delves into the territory of being an ego-maniac, but it takes a delusional sense of self-confidence to fight off an entire tyrannical regime or a vicious motorcycle gang. The world of Mad Max is not for the meek.
Virgos (August 23 – Sept 22)are the braniacs of the zodiac. They're analytical, hard-working and excel in scientific fields. This is why you would survive the post-apocalyptic world of I Am Legend. In the film, Will Smith's Robert Neville is a brilliant scientist, which is essential to his survival. Sure, Virgos may be the ones responsible for the man-made plague that turned the entirety of New York City into bloody-thirsty monsters, but it takes a Virgo to science their way out of the situation. Like Neville, you've got the drive and the smarts to find a cure by using your own immune blood. You just have to fight off infected people long enough to figure it out.
