15 'It's Complicated' Stories That Reveal What Happens When Friends And Relationships Mix

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Vote up the most complicated friendship stories.

Sometimes friendships are just more important than relationships and this can make things complicated... Here are some of the most memorable stories from r/relationship_advice that show what happens when friendships and relationships mix.


  • 1. Her Best Friend Got Pregnant And Wants Her Help Raising The Child

    From Redditor u/throwRAapartmentbaby:

    So yeah I've rented a room in a great 4 bedroom apartment for the past year and since my two roommates both are moving out in August, I've been offered to rent the whole apartment which is a great opportunity and I've already asked my two best friends if they wanted to sublet the two other rooms and move in with me which they were both very excited to do.

    My two current roommates aren't moved out yet and no lease has been signed either on my part or my two friends part, so it is still in the hypothetical. I've been transparent to my friends that it might fall through as my landlord might change his mind and just let me continue to rent the one room and not let anyone else move in as the building is going to be renovated once all renters have moved out.

    My one friend, Indy, has an apartment of her own that she's comfortable in so she isn't depending on this to go through, even though my apartment is definitely better located and more spacious.

    My other friend, Layla, still lives at home where she isn't in a rush to move out either so none of my friends would end up with nowhere to stay should this doesn't work out.

    Layla is very excited and I've been excited with her, talking about how we each have a bit of money saved that could go towards improving the apartment and it's been great to have someone to dream with the past month

    Now, things took a turn on Wednesday. Layla found out she's pregnant. She got tinder about 2 months ago and have been having some fun meeting new people and dating which is completely new territory for her. And so there are more than one option for a father, all of whom she isn't interested in involving. She's over the moon over this news and wants to keep the baby and raise it as a single mother. I personally think this is a terrible idea. She's only 21, she's not in university yet, only has a part time job of 4 hours a week, has never lived out of her parents home or taken care of herself at all. It's her decision and not mine though, and I will of course be there for her as I've known her for over 15 years and I lover her. She hasn't told her parents yet because they would flip out and she would like to be moved out before she does tell them. She wants to move into the apartment still, and raise the baby there with my friend and I. We met up Friday and she layed out this plan on how she could work until she knew what she wanted to do in terms of university, and my friend and I could babysit together, arranging it after our classes. She said we each could put our savings towards the baby as "we essentially would all be parents". I am just not okay with this at all. I feel like university is stressful and I don't have enough time as it is for my assignments without caring for a kid in my spare time. I am 22 and I also like doing 22 things like having friends over for a drink on Fridays and sleeping in on Sundays, having dates over and all that jazz. And having an infant in the apartment is just not something I see working out with my lifestyle. It's her choice to keep the baby but I don't think it's right to force my friend and I to be co parents with her. I think she has this romantic view of what its like to care for a small child, especially as a single, young mother with very little means and even though I love her, I'm not willing to sacrifice that amount of time and money on her decision to become a parent unexpectedly.

    She's only 6 weeks along so it's not an immediate problem, but I feel like I can't let her move in now. Indy doesn't know yet, but I'm thinking she will have the same feelings as me about the situation. Layla has told a few of her friends I'm not very close with, about her plan as if it is definitely going to happen and they are very excited for her and kinda hyping her up and further painting an idyllic picture of how she is going to raise this kid in my apartment.

    I just have no idea what to do right now. I don't know how I'm supposed to tell her that this is not going to work for me and she can't move in here with a baby. I didn't directly tell her I think it's insane for her to have a baby right now as this must be a tough and scary time for her and I didn't want to upset her too much. I did tell her I have concerns with how it would work out but she wasn't fazed at all. Should I tell her parents? Her mom is a very sweet and kind person who have always helped her but her dad is a different story and I don't know how he would react. I have considered talking to Indy about it and maybe figure out a way for us to tell her together, or something but yeah any advice or comments are appreciated! Thank you :)

  • 2. He Found Out That His Best Friend Started Dating His Ex

    From Redditor u/ThrowRA8653568:

    Throwaway because I use my main for gaming subs and don’t want this on my history

    Cassie and I were together for 5 years. We started dating in high school and stayed together through college, moved in together after graduation. I’ve been in love with her since before our first date. She’s amazing. I still think so.

    We were talking about marriage and starting a family soon. Then one day a few months ago Cassie wanted to “talk,” sat me down, and said she decided she doesn’t want kids. She didn’t just mean not now but not ever. I’ve always wanted to be a dad. My dad sucked and this is something I’ve wanted to do ever since I was still a kid myself.

    When she finished talking I told her it was over. She started crying and I was already crying, but f*ck. If she doesn’t want the same thing I do from the future what else can I do? She said she’s been thinking this way for years and corona was the last straw. I’m not going to wait around and hope she changes her mind when she might not.

    So I moved out and moved in with my best friend “Ryan”. We’ve been friends forever, like we bonded over Pokemon cards at the playground kind of thing. He’s basically my brother and his mom was my extra mom since I didn’t have much at home growing up.

    I was in a hurry to move out so I didn’t take much stuff with me, and then I didn’t want to go back to the apartment and see Cassie, so Ryan was doing the good friend thing and going to get stuff for me whenever I needed it. At least that’s what I thought he was doing.

    Yesterday would have been me and Cassie’s 6th anniversary and it was really rough for me, so I told Ryan I didn’t want to be alone and wanted to hang out and game all day with him. He agreed and everything, but he was kind of distracted on his phone a lot, and after a couple hours he said “something came up” and just left me there alone.

    Almost midnight last night, Ryan finally came home and was acting weird so I asked what was up. I thought maybe his mom was sick or something, she’s a teacher at a school that just reopened.

    But no Ryan sits me down and tells me he’s moving out. He’s been secretly dating Cassie since a few weeks after we split. He says they’re in love already and that she needs him more than I do, so he’s moving into the apartment with her and leaving me here alone to rot.

    I don’t even know how to process this. I don’t know which one of them has broken me more. To make things worse I messaged some of our other friends this morning to tell them what’s up and they already knew. When I got upset they all said it was “no big deal” because I’m the one who broke up with Cassie.

    Where do I even go from here? I can’t talk to my friends, my ex broke my heart, my best friend stomped on it, and the closest thing I have to family is gone because they were his family too. I’m lost and don’t know where else to turn.

  • 3. He Was Warned By His Girlfriend's Ex About Her Best Friend

    From Redditor u/throwRAnewwgff:

    We have been dating for 4 months now and everything has been gr8 except for one thing, her bff. Dude is clearly in love with her but she refuses to see it. He is always joking about how he is the one will make her the happiest, that she should be with as they are soulmates etc. She has known the dude for close to 8 years now and has never dated him but he has been her bff for a very long time. It didnt bother me till she started bringing him on our dates as "he was feeling lonely and he has no other friends". Seriously dude is 32 but I have never seen him with any friends. In face our first fight was also about him as she was asking me to take him with me when I was going to hang out with my friends but I drew a clear red line- not happening. Also, around one month ago her ex contacted me via facebook (we attended the same college) and asked me to be careful about the bff. At that time I thought it was just something a jealous ex would say but now but now I agree with him 100%. Dude calls her regularly when she is out with me, always tries to come with us on our dates and generally makes demands on her time so much that sometimes I feel like a third wheel. Now I should make it clear that my gf never crosses any boundaries with him, but at the same time she doesnt shut him down forcefully.

    At first I thought about giving her an ultimatum but ours is a 4 month old relationship and they go back 8 years, there's no point in giving an ultimatum. So the only other way is to break up with her, which is a shame because she is an awesome gf apart from this. Is there any other way Reddit? Anything I can do so that our relationship doesnt breakdown? i would really like to hear any and all plans, please guys. Thank you.

  • 4. His Girlfriend Claimed She Was With Her Friend When That Friend Was With Him

    From Redditor u/throwra_wheredshego:

    God this is a doozy. I swear my life feels like a movie right now. Sorry for the weird formatting, I'm on mobile and this is my first time posting on a sub like this.

    I (28M) am planning on proposing to my girlfriend of 3 years (26F). Now, I suck at picking out jewelry. Im the type of guy that doesn't see a problem with heart shaped jewelry (seriously why is it considered so ugly?) so every time I want to buy something for my girl, I usually consult one of our mutual friends. My girl's best friends are all friends with me as well and we all get along well, so asking them for help picking out jewelry is something I'm used to.

    When it came time to pick out a ring, I consulted my girlfriends best friend Justine (fake name). Justine and I are quite close and she knows my girlfriend better than anyone, including me. So, when my girlfriend when out to visit her sister and baby nephew, I invited Justine over to the house to help pick out a ring.

    Justine and I looked through a few catalogues, but decided it was a dead end and it would be better to go to professionals at a jewelry store. However, I didn't know when my girlfriend would be coming home, so Justine and I thought of a clever text to gauge how much time we had. I asked her when she'd be coming home, as I was ordering takeout and wanted to know when to tell them to have the food ready by.

    She responded by saying it would be a few hours, she met up with Justine to go shopping. Now, obviously this took me by surprise since Justine was standing inside my house. I showed Justine the text, and she looked as confused as I was.

    It isn't out of the ordinary for my girlfriend to meet up with people out of the blue like that for shopping, lunch, etc. She's a very spontaneous person and loves making plans on the fly. So ordinarily, I would have believed this text in a heartbeat. However, obviously this had to be a lie.

    When she came home she acted completely normal, and I played along but it's been really hard to act like everything's fine. We got takeout, ate together, and cuddled on the couch after. So far she's caught on a little that somethings upsetting me, but I just can't tell her what. Looking at her kills me.

    I don't know what to do. My girlfriend and I have zero trust issues and we tell each other everything, so this lie is killing me. I want to ask her about it so bad, but if I tell her I knew she was lying, I'd have to explain why, and I really don't want to do that. What do I do? I know she lied to me but I don't know how to confront her about it. Should I just forget it? This won't stop gnawing at me. Please help!

  • 5. Their Moms Are Best Friends And Pressured Them To Date

    From Redditor u/[deleted]:

    For reference, my mom’s best friend is L and her daughter is H. Sorry if this is long.

    My mom and L have been best friends since middle school. They both got married and had a kid at a young age. According to them, they found out my mom was having a boy and L was having a girl and joked that it was their life mission to have me and H end up together. Doesn’t really seem like a joke now.

    For as long as I can remember, H and L have always been around. I was always forced to play with and take “cute” pictures with H. I specifically remember my mom and L saying these photos will be cute at their wedding one day. Honestly, I felt like I saw H way too much. She was literally in my class every year from 1st to 6th grade. Our moms are both teachers so they definitely had something to do with that. H and I would always be teased by our teachers and it was super embarrassing.

    As we got into middle school, I realized I didn’t really like H and she didn’t like me. We had nothing in common, but we were forced to get along. We resented each other for it. Anytime we would argue with each other, our moms would just downplay it and say we were acting like an old married couple.

    Fast forward to this past summer. My mom had a big 40th birthday at my house. Of course H and L were there. H was the only person my age at the party and you know what? I actually had a great time with her. We didn’t drink at all, so we just laughed at how drunk everyone else was at the party. Eventually H and I got tired and went to bed. Keep in mind, some people were staying over so it was planned that H and I would be sharing my room. It was awkward at first and there was definitely some tension. Sure enough, H makes a move by initiating a kiss and things escalated from there. Afterwards, we actually talked through some of our issues. We agreed that we didn’t always have to fight with each other. We joked that it was a great birthday gift to my mom by finally giving her what they wanted. She gave me a big hug and we went to sleep. We were more friendly with each other after that and I think my mom and L noticed. They started bothering us again to start dating. We both said no and to just be thankful that we don’t hate each other anymore.

    Now we go to the same college and text a lot more, but rarely see each other. We ended up at the same party recently and hooked up again. H asked if I wanted to hang out which has never happened before. L heard about our plans and told my mom. They go crazy again by saying it’s finally happening. H and I got something to eat and talked about how frustrating it is to feel this much pressure. We both are starting to like each other but feel like we’re enabling our moms’ crazy behavior. We left it at that and decided to talk another time.

    So what do I do? I know for sure that H is starting to like me. I can’t tell if we’re just maturing or if these are legitimate feelings. I also hate this feeling that we’re going to prove my mom and L right after how much they’ve embarrassed us.

  • 6. His Best Friend Thought She Was Gay But Confessed That She Now Has Feelings For Him

    From Redditor u/Goat7618:

    Just to give some context: I have known this girl (let’s call her K) since we were 14. I met K when we were paired up in a group project for this one class. I found out we had a lot in common and we became friends. Over time, I developed a huge crush on her. Sophomore year I asked her to homecoming and she said yes! It was a good time, but after it didn’t really lead to anything, I got the sense that she didn’t like me the way I liked her. Junior year, K came out as lesbian. Honestly, I wasn’t super surprised but I was a little heartbroken. I decided to put all my feelings away and just be supportive.

    I was really enjoying my senior year. I started dating this girl the summer before school started (thanks to K setting us up)Things were going well until Covid hit. My GF broke up with me because she couldn’t handle a relationship at the time. I was sad about that but more upset that I was gonna miss things like Prom and senior trip. K knew I was upset and invited me over for a fake prom which consisted of us getting dressed up for photos and immediately going inside to play old Wii games and watch movies. She even bought some of my favorite snacks. Still probably the nicest thing anyone’s ever done for me.

    First year of college sucked. Nothing noteworthy happened other than K and I going to the same school. K started to date this girl who I’m 99% sure hated me for no reason. They break up in the summer and now we can move onto the important part of my story.

    K and I decided to get a place near campus together for this school year. Her mom thought it was weird, but her dad (coolest guy ever BTW) thought it was a good idea. We’ve had lots of good times so far. My favorite thing about living together has been our late night talks. We talk about anything from school, sports, hot girls, bad hookups, etc. Last night during one of our talks, K randomly brings up that she might be bisexual. Not gonna lie, I felt a little jealous thinking that she hooked up with a random guy. But she tells me that she has feelings for me. I kind of laughed it off at first until she started crying. She said she started having feelings for me a month ago and was super confused about her sexuality. I apologized for laughing and said we’d talk tomorrow. I didn’t want to make any bad decisions that could ruin our friendship. So right now she’s at class and I’m just alone thinking. This is literally a dream come true, so why am I hesitating at all?!! I guess I don’t want her to just immediately change her mind after and make things weird between us. I’m anxiously waiting for her to get back. I really do love her though I never thought I’d have a chance at this kind of love. Any advice on what I should say to her when she gets back? I feel like I’m overthinking this lol.