Drunkenness gets a lot of press. Wild, crazy, stupid drunkenness that is. Relaxing, lazy inebriation is much less written about. And that's surprising, as it's a really lovely state of being. So now you have it, a list for all the mellow drunks, the ones who cherish the pleasant numbing feeling of alcohol slowly traveling through the veins, warming the body, loosening the muscles, inducing a welcome sleepiness of the body and the mind.
What are the most relaxing ways to get drunk? Extensive research turned up a few common themes: 1) Drinking alcohol in or near water is calming and enjoyable. 2) Drinking to cool down or warm up does the body right. 3) Already being sleepy, and drinking liquor to get sleepier, is very nice. 4) Drinking immediately following strenuous physical exertion has a yin and yang kind of balancing effect, as your sporty self moves into the realm of feeling no pain.
But really, who cares?! Analysis takes energy, and that's contrary to the spirit of this list. Don't overthink it. Recall your favorite drunken muscle memories and vote up the most relaxing ways to get drunk (or add any we missed!)
Sitting by the Fire Best done with someone you love. Or like. But nothing wrong with doing it alone.
Relaxing in a Hot Tub Serious muscle relaxation. Serious.
Tubing Down a River Don't follow the example of the lady pictured here. Avoid glass, choose cans.
Sitting on a Stoop and People Watching Turn the bustle of the city on its head.
Floating on a Pool Raft in Close Proximity to a Swim Up Bar Go for a daquiri, pina coloda, or any drink decorated with a little umbrella.
RobLein added Watching TV; in Your La-Z Boy
Showering with a Beer Affectionately known as "the beer shower."
Drinking Wine While Taking a Bath Optimal when you are home alone on a Friday or Saturday night, and happy about it.
Lying in Bed with a Breakfast Drink Classic choices are mimosas and bloody Marys. But there's no sense in being a stickler for tradition.
Wearing a Smoking Jacket, Smoking a Pipe or Cigar, Sipping Scotch This won't work unless you've got both attitude and style.
Boozing in the Dugout / Locker Room After the Game Warning: you risk getting rowdy. But if done right, it's really relaxing.
Drinking Après-Ski Staying in hot, uncomfortable ski boots and ski pants remarkably somehow makes it better.
Watching Nascar for Hours Great way to spend a Sunday?