Songs You Didn't Realize Were Wildly Inappropriate As A Kid

Voting Rules
Vote up the songs you'll never hear the same way again.

Most of us just sing songs and pay no mind to the meaning or even really think about the lyrics. Songs you didn't realize were inappropriate as a kid include everything from rap tunes to upbeat, cheery pop singles – or even these songs you shouldn't have been singing in childhood.

It may seem really obvious now that "December, '63 (Oh, What a Night)" is about a dude having a one night stand and popping his cherry, but, as a kid, maybe it's not. We hear the upbeat, funky song at a party or a wedding and dance around to it without really paying attention. What exactly does Neil Diamond mean when he sings, “reaching out, touching you, touching me?” Did anyone ever stop and ask, “What is the English translation to the Macarena?”

And those are just a few of the secretly scandalous songs that may ruin the innocence of your childhood. Read on to discover more, and vote up your favorite songs that you also didn't know were wildly inappropriate as a kid.

Photo: Universal / Virgin

  • 'Macarena' - Los Del Río
    Video: YouTube

    Chances are that about 99% of the weddings you've attended since 1994 have played "Macarena." The international dance hit, with its very own signature moves, ranks No. 7 on Billboard's All Time Top 100. But did anyone ever care to ask what the Spanish song actually means?

    Well, according to Huffington Post's translation, it appears that this girl named Macarena has a boyfriend, but she is cheating on him with two of his friends – probably at the same time, while he is getting drafted into the army. Ouch! That doesn't seem like a nice song to dance to at weddings.

    3,941 votes
  • 'Summer of '69' - Bryan Adams
    Video: YouTube

    Canadian rocker Bryan Adams topped the charts in 1985 with his smash hit "Summer of 69." At face value, the protagonist in the song seems to be reminiscing about this incredible summer during his youth: "those were the best days of my life."

    If we do a little math, however, we find Adams was only ten years old in 1969. That's ok, maybe he's telling someone else's story; musicians often do that. But as it turns out, that is actually not the case.

    Adams came right out and admitted, during an interview in 2009, that the song has nothing to do with the year 1969. "A lot of people think it's about the year," Adams said, "but actually, it's more about making love in the summertime. It's using '69 as a sexual reference."

    3,935 votes
  • 'Poker Face' - Lady Gaga
    Video: YouTube

    Believe it or not, Lady Gaga's international hit single, "Poker Face," has absolutely nothing to do with playing cards. Gaga does a good job of throwing in her fair share of innuendos, however, she has admitted that the song is totally about sex. She explained that the idea for "Poker Face" came about when she was dating a guy, but every time she made love to him, she would think about girls.

    Rolling Stone asked Lady Gaga what she meant exactly by the "Poker Face" lyric, "bluffin' with my muffin." She replied: 

    "Obviously, it's my p*ssy's poker face! I took that line from another song I wrote but never released, called 'Blueberry Kisses.' It was about a girl singing to her boyfriend about how she wants him to go down on her, and I used the lyric. [Sings'] "Blueberry kisses, the muffin man misses them kisses."

    3,362 votes
  • 'December, '63 (Oh What A Night)' - The Four Seasons
    Video: YouTube

    When The Four Seasons released "December 1963," it became an instant global hit. But Frankie Valli and his pals are not just talking about a really fun night, or even a great love affair. The band has admitted that they had to downplay the sexual angle of the song. Valli himself has come out and said that the song was about "losing your cherry."

    The sexual encounter described in the tune was also a one night stand, and there is also the falsetto part which pretty much describes an orgasm:

    And I felt a rush like a rolling bolt of thunder
    Spinning my head around and taking my body under
    Oh, what a night!

    2,306 votes
  • 'Barbie Girl' - Aqua
    Video: YouTube

    "Barbie Girl" was everywhere in 1997. However, the song about Barbie and Ken dolls became extremely controversial. Mattel even sued MCA Records Inc. for violating copyright laws – turning Barbie into a sex object and confusing consumers who may have thought the toy company backed the song. A California federal appeals court eventually declined to reinstate the lawsuit.

    Here are some of the more inappropriate lyrics that have been criticized for being demeaning towards women and being overtly sexual.

    I'm a blond bimbo girl, in a fantasy world
    Dress me up, make it tight, I'm your dolly
    You're my doll, rock'n'roll, feel the glamor in pink
    Kiss me here, touch me there, hanky panky
    You can touch you can play
    If you say 'I'm always yours'

    3,061 votes
  • 'Sweet Caroline' - Neil Diamond
    Video: YouTube

    "Sweet Caroline," is a bar band staple and karaoke favorite. The song has become so popular that it's played during the 8th inning of every Red Sox game at Fenway Park. Neil Diamond finally revealed in 2007 that he innocently wrote the song for a young Caroline Kennedy when her father was president.

    However, Diamond's lyrics definitely have at least a hint of sexuality to them: "One, touching one / Reaching out, touching me, touching you."

    2,531 votes