These Quotes Go to ElevenThe greatest, funniest, and most iconic movie and TV quotes from your all-time favorite comedies (and a few you probably haven’t seen).
"Stand Up Guys" movie quotes tell the tale of two old friends reunited after nearly 30 years apart when one has been tasked with killing the other. The film was written by Noah Haidle and directed by Fisher Stevens. It was released in theaters in the United States on February 1, 2013.
In "Stand Up Guys," Val (Al Pacino) is released from prison after serving 28 years for the accidental death of the son of Claphands (Mark Margolis). Doc (Christopher Walken), Val's only friend, picks him up from the slammer and the two begin to catch up. This however is interrupted, and fast, when Val presses Doc to admit that Doc was sent by Claphands to kill him as retribution for his son's death.
Giving his friend a temporary reprieve, Doc allows Val to have one last night of fun, crime and debauchery before his death. Along with their friend Hirsch (Alan Arkin), the three enjoy a wild night filled with drugs, fast cars and hot women. At the end of the night however, Doc realizes the conundrum he's in having to kill his closest friend. Julianna Margulies, Katheryn Winnick and Vanessa Ferlito co-star in the crime-comedy film.
Val: "They say we die twice, once when the breath leaves our body and once when the last person we know says our name."
Val contemplates death, but not in the traditional sense. He mentions how death is not something that happens only when someone takes their last breath but also again when their memory is forgotten.
Doc: "This is my best friend. He just got back from a long trip."
Val: "Let's just drop the welcome home thing. So who's going to do it?"
Doc: "Do what?"
Val: "You know, come on, just say it. It's you."
Doc: "It's me. What do you want to do until then?"
As Doc and Val visit in a diner after Val's release from prison, Doc tries to be friendly but Val wants him to cut to the chase. Val knows Claphands has put a hit out on him and Val wants to know who was assigned to take him out. Unfortunately, that person happens to be Doc.
Sylvia: "Who are you guys?"
Doc: "Remember that?"
Val: "Oh, my baby, I missed you."
Doc: "Mr. Hirsch"
Hirsch: "Remember me? I do this."
Doc: "What time is it?"
Hirsch: "I don't know. What time is it?"
Val: "It's time to kick ass or chew gum"
Doc: "And guess what? I'm all out of gum."
Hirsch: "Hey pal, it's like the old days, isn't it?"
Val: "No, it's better."
As the three men prepare for their last hurrah, they visit Sylvia to arm up for the night. Of course they also have some fun while they're at it.
Val: "Forgive me, father, for I have sinned"
Priest: "How long since your last confession?"
Val: "60 years, give or take a few"
Priest: "Now, confess each and every serious sin that separates you from christ."
Val: "Oh no, we'd be here forever. Why don't we just deal with today? So far I stole a sweet-ass car, a bunch of drugs but I did some good stuff too. I rescued my friend. So can I say a hail mary and be done here?"
Priest: "I don't think you can hail mary your way out of this one."
Val: "You're right."
In the final moments before his death, Val takes confession. While he doesn't have enough time to confess all his sins in his many years, he does have time for what happened that day, which is still a pretty lengthy list.
Hirsch: "You did your time like a man, Val. You're a stand up all the way."
Val: "You and Doc would have done all the same."
Hirsch: "Well I would like to think so."
Doc: "It's possible, either way is possible, but you did it, Val."
Val: "True. I can't believe you guys didn't work together all this time."
Doc: "Nope"
Hirsch: "No, Claphands retired. That was that."
Doc: "And it was."
Val: "He can't forgive himself so everyone else has got to pay."
Hirsch: "So what do you want to do now that you're out, pal?"
Val: "I always wanted to finish high school, learn more about the human condition. How about you, Hirsch? Is there anything in this life that you haven't done that you would like to have a chance to do?"
Hirsch: "Two girls at the same time"
Val: "That's very doable, no, Doc?"
Doc: "Yeah, done and done"
The three men reflect on how things could have gone differently had Val not taken the rap for the killing of Claphands' son. Knowing their time is limited, they prioritize what they'd like to do in Val's final hours.
