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What Would Happen If People Actually Stormed Area 51?  

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1.8k votes 270 voters 3.4k views 17 items

List Rules Vote up the most likely results of this burgeoning attack on the country's most mythical top-secret fortress.

Area 51 has been such a pillar of the conspiratorial imagination for so long, it was only a matter of time before there was a coordinated effort to crash the place. Or, failing that, at least a viral rumor about a grass-roots effort to do so.

That time has finally come. The "event" in question - "Storm Area 51, They Can't Stop All Of Us" - was first posted on Facebook, with a date set for September 20, 2019. RSVPs soared into the seven figures, with another million or so expressing interest. The plan? Show up outside Area 51, split up into three carefully defined groups - Rock Throwers, Naruto Runners, and Kyles - and overrun the notoriously secretive military base. The endgame? Aliens, of course.

While the would-be seige may not be a genuine attempt to uncover extraterrestrial life while destabilizing the on-site security apparatus of a well-funded arm of the military (and/or a secret unit of the FBI specializing in paranormal activity), that hasn't stopped people from speculating about what might happen - what could happen - if the rogue offensive were to actually take place. Hypothetically. (Wink, wink.) What would happen in the event of an actual Area 51 raid? 

1
No one will get near the facility.

via /u/ Skruff94

2
Most will give up quickly, while Area 51 security sits back, watches, and laughs.

via /u/ Birddawg65

3
The authorities will close all the roads ahead of time.

via /u/ faceintheblue

4
The government will call in the National Guard and set up massive roadblocks.

via /u/ JamesTrendall

5
Security will hold off the raid using tear gas and razor fences.
6
There will be heat exhaustion, dehydration, sunburn, and death en masse.

via /u/ Kaligraphic

7
The government will use the opportunity to test out new, non-lethal weaponry.

via /u/ Qenes

8
A low-flying helicopter will kick up dust and scare everyone off.

via /u/ doggrimoire

9
Everyone will get detained.

via /u/ Ricky_RZ

10
Base administration will troll everyone with high-tech projections, aircraft lights, and loud noises.
11
A hundred thousand teenagers will stroll into a meat grinder.

via /u/ Binyl

12
A giant door will open and an AT-AT Walker will emerge.
13
Everyone will get the publicity they want and the whole thing will stay peaceful.
14
Participants will find a smorgasbord of alien evidence... and then Ashton Kutcher will pop out to reveal they've all been Punk'd.
15
Base command will put up a bunch of tents and turn the raid into a nerdy celebration.

via /u/ XO-42

16
Aliens will prove to be willing and compatible romantic partners.

via /u/ WampaBurgers

17
Aliens will zap everyone back to their homes and leave them with fuzzy dreamlike memories.

via /u/ Gutshot1971