Ugly facial hair happens. Weird facial hair happens. We get it. But history has been extremely creative with facial hair in some pretty shocking ways. Dumb mustaches have been coming in and out of style since humanity began, and gross beards that need to be washed way more than they are have been popular and will be again. This is a fact of life.
But sometimes, seeing all of these beards can be difficult. Even painful. However, this is an important lesson in the folly of mankind. Vote up the weirdest facial hair trends ever.
One of the problems with not having a beard is that your chin can get pretty cold. The Gauls, Franks, Goths, and Saxons all came up with the same fashionable solution: grow your mustache so long that it is basically a beard. This style was incredibly prevalent and persisted for centuries, so it must have worked.
The Health Beard
Victorians took beard-love to the next level. They not only believed that beards were natural, but that they were gifts from God that were important for your physical health. They feared that shaving off your facial hair would result in throat and mouth diseases, and even bronchitis.
The Braided Goatee
A staple of late '90s rock and metal, the braided goatee takes the worst qualities of the goatee and the rat tail in order to create one of the most unsettling styles of all time. We probably have at least a few decades before this style attempts a comeback, so that's something to be grateful for.
The Mutton Chops
The 19th century popularity of the massive and honestly frightening sideburns known as mutton chops is difficult to understand, since it's not a look that has come back in a big way since. However, it is forever a part of American history, as not one, not two, but three presidents sported the look. John Quincy Adams, Martin Van Buren, and Chester Allen Arthur all confidently rocked mutton chops and seemed to have no regrets.