Customer Service & Retail
300 voters

Jokes Retail Workers Are Tired Of Hearing

April 13, 2020 2.9k votes 300 voters 16.6k views19 items

List RulesVote up the most unbelievably stale jokes.

Retail workers, often underappreciated and underpaid, are so over one part of their job: the groan-worthy jokes they hear again and again. Customers, you are NOT kings and queens of comedy. Dunces is more like it.

Someone who works for minimum wage while wearing an unflattering company T-shirt does not necessarily appreciate your attempts at dad-joke humor. A hackneyed quip might be better than the rude, illicit, or scary things customers do that require secret retail codes, but still, those who fancy themselves as store comedians should just pay up and save the retail jokes for someone who hasn't heard them before. Which is no one. 

  • 1

    The 'It Must Be Free' One

    From Redditor /u/Larry2Thumbs:

    "No price tag, so it's free today, right?"

  • 2

    The One About Not Being Able To Find A Million Dollars

    From Redditor /u/Youcanthearjimmy:

    [Me:] Is there anything I can help you find?

    [Customer:] Yeah, a million dollars.

    I hated having to smile at every idiot that said this.

  • 3

    The 'Working Hard Or Hardly Working' One

    From Redditor /u/gabbiblack:

    The “[Are you] working hard or hardly working?” joke...

    [I]t’s a guaranteed eye roll.

  • 4

    The One About Printing Fake Bills

    From a Redditor:

    When I used to work on the tills of a large Swedish furniture store and I had to check a stack of notes (especially [$50 bills]), I'd pretty much always hear, "They're fine, I printed them myself this morning, hahaha."

    A polite smile would hide clenched teeth.