Photo: 2 Broke Girls / CBS

The Jokes Restaurant Servers Are Tired Of Hearing

Mallory Weiler
March 31, 2020 3.0K votes 391 voters 23.1K views
Voting Rules
Vote up the jokes restaurant servers should get an extra-big tip for putting up with.

The silliest of jokes - many waiters would argue - come from customers at restaurants. How many times have you overheard or even said the corny joke about hating the meal when the plate has been practically licked clean? Or tried to give the bill to a child at the table, or another table altogether? But servers hear these jokes day in and day out, and to keep the tips coming in, they have to keep a smile on their face no matter how awful the joke really is. 

Check out the stupid customer jokes restaurant servers are sick of hearing, and vote up the worst ones. 

Photo: 2 Broke Girls / CBS
  • 1
    186 VOTES

    When They Joke About Not Having Enough Money

    From Redditor /u/seekertrudy:

    "Looks like my son will have to do the dishes..."

    186 votes
  • 2
    174 VOTES

    When They Fake Criticize The Food

    From Redditor /u/rx79g:

    Q: How was your food today? A: Awful...

    Every time someone does this with a straight face while they're paying, I have to ask if they'd like to speak to the manager. One time I laughed in response when they were totally serious and had had pretty poor service and were genuinely upset. If you're going to do this, at least make it very obvious you're joking.

    174 votes
  • 3
    192 VOTES

    When They Say 'No' To Showing ID

    From Redditor /u/WeaselBit:

    "Can I see your ID?"

    "No." Pauses, laughs, and proceeds to pull it out to show me.

    "Awesome, thanks." Unamused.

    192 votes
  • 4
    229 VOTES

    The 'Anything Else' Requests

    From Redditor /u/Bizarro_orraziB:

    "Can I get you anything else?"

    "How about the winning lotto numbers!"

    Or when they take the check and say, "So how much do ya owe me?"

    Ouch. My sides. Please. Stop.

    229 votes
  • 5
    145 VOTES

    The 'Keep The Change' Quip From The Drunk Guy Who Underpays

    From Redditor /u/Oliveribus:

    I'm a waiter in a local cocktail bar and the funniest joke of drunk guys is the "I give you not enough money and tell you to keep the change."

    Haha, never heard that before...

    145 votes
  • 6
    215 VOTES

    The 'It Was Terrible'

    From Redditor /u/hanzahbonanza:

    When you clear the empty plates and ask how their meal was and they say, “Oh it was just terrible!” as a joke, because ya know the food was good and they ate everything.

    It’d be funnier if I didn’t hear it at least five times a shift.

    215 votes