Slang From Dead Languages That's So Fresh Rigor Mortis Hasn't Set In Yet

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Vote up the super fresh dead language slang you use to light up a party like Nero.

Sometimes a simple "f*ck you" doesn’t cut it and you need some funny ancient phrases to spice up your life and Yo Mama battles. If you’re dying to get into dead languages because you’ve already mastered hobo slang, and slang terms from the 1930s are simply a great depression, then it’s high time that you start speaking like someone from Ancient Greece. Keep reading to get knee-deep into some dead language slang, and make your linguistics professor proud and maybe a little offended.

Most people have an idea in their heads that humans who lived thousands of years ago were incredibly proper and acted as the kindest of knaves, but judging from their slang terms that’s simply not true. Romans spoke filthy slang that got awfully precise, and those who spoke ye olde Middle English had some of the most disgusting terms you’ve ever heard. Begin recycling some of these third-degree dead language burns, and experience a comeback greater than Jesus from his tomb.

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  • 1


    People who spoke Middle English referred to potatoes as earthapples, which is what everyone should be calling them right now. 

  • 2

    Calidam Mingō Quod Frīgidam Bibī

    Are you trying to tell people you do the best you can in bad situations? Then use this ancient Latin phrase that means "I piss hot what I drank cold."

  • 3


    The ancient Egyptians referred to their babies as nunus, based on the word nu which means fragile. 

  • 4


    Normal folks who spoke Latin when it was still a viable language used this to talk about going #2 rather than using the fancy pants excreta.

  • 5


    The next time you hear someone talking trash just call them a blob-tale, it's what people who spoke Middle English used to call out gossips. 

  • 6


    In ancient Greek "phu" means "to plant seeds," which, as a surprise to no one, eventually became a euphemism for sex.

  • 7

    Operae Pretium

    In Ancient Latin you would say this when you were trying to convince someone to hang out. It means "worth the bother."

  • 8


    This ancient Roman phrase might be the best on the list because it means that you're totally "f*cked out."

  • 9


    In Middle English a secret trench that someone could trip in was called a "ha-ha," although there's nothing funny about a twisted ankle. 

  • 10

    Lupus In Fābulā

    When you're talking about someone and they show up you would say this, which means "a wolf in the tale," the Ancient Roman version of 'speak of the devil.'

  • 11


    Ancient Norse bros used bikkja to refer to female dogs and you can see where this is going. 

  • 12


    If you were around when people were speaking Middle English you would use this word to describe a parent or guardian because they bared their fangs like parental animals - which is kind of insane. 

  • 13

    Dūc Tē!

    If you were in Ancient Rome and wanted to tell someone to "get lost" this would be how you did it. 

  • 14


    If you were speaking Sanskrit around 1500 BCE you would use yabhama to tell someone "lets f*ck," which would not work today.

  • 15


    Before it meant what it actually means, the ancient Greeks initially used the words to describe a tail, but then they started using it to describe a front tail. 

  • 16

    Mūs In Matellā

    This translates to "mouse in a chamberpot," which is disgusting and has something to do with someone having their hands too full. If you ever have to use this word literally, your hands will definitely be full of crap.

  • 17


    Ancient Romans would use this word when they were talking about butts, just like Pitbull does today. 

  • 18

    Ī In Malam Crucem

    This literally means "get crucified." Whatever you do, don't say this to Jesus. 

  • 19


    This Coptic word means to fondle someone. Anyone out there gettin' some tabtab?

  • 20


    Betaw is an Egyptian slang word for “cheap bread” which comes from the ancient Egyptian words bat (the) and taw (bread). 

  • 21


    According to Middle English if you had a dringle then you had a good day's work. 

  • 22

    Hāmum Vorāre

    This translates to "to swallow this hook," so you would use this when you trick someone into an Ocean's 11 type scheme. 

  • 23


    In Plautus' Aulularia, a character frequently abuses a character by calling him "scelus" which means a crime or sin, not a kind of person, so get ready to hurt some feelings with this one. 

  • 24


    In the Coptic language which existed from 100 CE - 1600 CE the word berber initially meant to drip, but it was adopted to mean when a nose was running. 

  • 25


    This word comes from the proverb “Halla Halla from outside, and from inside nobody knows," which is a really confusing phrase that has something to do with sweetness, or being sweet maybe?