Graveyard Shift Bloody Details From Thailand's Sacred "Self-Mutilation" Festival  

Lisa A. Flowers
34.4k views 10 items Embed

As the annals of religion go, self-mutilation (AKA "corporal mortification of the flesh") is a tradition that's almost as ancient as the mystery of how we came to have flesh, itself. Voluntarily torturing the physical body (and its pesky tendency to lust after other bodies, sicken, and die) remains a diehard tenet of many spiritual practices, even in this day and age. Every year, for example, droves of hardcore Catholics celebrate Lent by cutting themselves with blades, wearing crowns of wire that cut into their skin, and deliberately roasting themselves under the hot sun.

One group we don't expect such extravagant shenanigans from, however, are hardcore vegetarians. Nevertheless, the participants in Thailand's Vegetarian Festival (AKA the “Self-Mutilation Festival” or the “Nine Emperor Gods Festival”), definitely take self-flagellation to full-blown levels of cinematic, Lovecraftian torture. Moreover, they do it every year, and in front of thousands of rapt, hard-partying followers.

According to Pacific Standard, the festival is meant to celebrate “observance to the vegan diet and a welcoming of the emperor gods.” And to be sure, it does feature music, elaborately choreographed dances, delectable street food, and general merrymaking, like any other world-renowned carnival would. However, its main claim to fame still consists of presentations that are perhaps more akin to voluntary-snuff-films-as-Broadway-musicals (even though no one dies... usually). Below are a handful of harrowing details that may or may not inspire you to consider giving up any food that once had to pass through a slaughterhouse, 

Human Pincushions


Human Pincushions is listed (or ranked) 1 on the list Bloody Details From Thailand's Sacred "Self-Mutilation" Festival
Photo:  Joseph Ferris III/via Wikimedia Commons

Acupuncture or torture? If you've truly mastered the Zen-like art of transcending pain, the two are merely different names for the same kind of spiritual therapy. (In other words, torture by any other name would feel as blank-but-excruciating).

In this video, a reveler sits in a meditative-yet-agitated state (note the frantic head bobbing) while being beautifully decorated with a lavish array of long, razor-sharp, iridescently pink needles.

Bicycles Through The Face


Bicycles Through The Face is listed (or ranked) 2 on the list Bloody Details From Thailand's Sacred "Self-Mutilation" Festival
Photo:  Joseph Ferris III/via Wikimedia Commons

When most people hear the words “bicycle through the face,” they undoubtedly think of wiping out on the trail, or sustaining some type of injury that necessitates incessant Oxycontin jonesing and bouts of agonizing facial reconstruction surgery. But for the reveler in this picture, a bike through the face is just spiritual business as usual

The artistry of the act comes not from the technical process of mangling one's visage, mind you, but from the unexpected whimsy of what one decides to insert through one's cheeks. And no one can deny that a bicycle is a completely (and refreshingly) unlikely choice.

Barbed Wire Through The Face


Barbed Wire Through The Face is listed (or ranked) 3 on the list Bloody Details From Thailand's Sacred "Self-Mutilation" Festival
Photo:  Joseph Ferris III/via Wikimedia Commons

Usually, barbed wire is used to indicate a line that must not be crossed upon pain of shredding, but at the Self-Mutilation Festival, boundaries are limitless. One can make as many barbed comments as they like, but they can't say that this reveler isn't putting his pain (and tourists' money) where his mouth is.

In the meantime, other partygoers (like this man with a power tool through his face) are busy finding creative ways of nailing their own mouths shut.

Meat Hooks Through The Back (And Face)


Meat Hooks Through The Back (A... is listed (or ranked) 4 on the list Bloody Details From Thailand's Sacred "Self-Mutilation" Festival
Photo:  Joseph Ferris III/via Wikimedia Commons

Most of the spectators in this video were undoubtedly on tetherhooks, as the saying goes; but that surely pales in comparison to being on literal meat hooks. The participants in this ritual appear to be entirely unconcerned as they levitate far above the earth - not by way of the spiritual ecstasy they're seeking via self-mutilation, but by way of their actual flesh. (A few festive and "cosmetic" hookings through the cheek make for an even more impressive display).