Your mama may have told you to always wash your hands, but did she properly instruct you on the importance of bathroom border maintenance? How about strategic stall selection? Never fear, my commode compadre, for the 10 commandments of the urinal are here to help guide your way through the treacherous terrain of your local latrine.
There is a thin line between the "Heman Woman Haters Club" and the Men's Room
As men we only have so many places we can run to, to get away from our women. Don't be that guy who brings his girl over on poker night. And DON'T be that guy who is gettin' stank on his hang low in the stall.
Plus smelling another man's s**t isn't a turn on for anybody.
Tunnel vision has a negative connotation to it. But in the Men's Room it is LAW
When you creep up to a urinal you keep your hands and feet within the Piss Borders and your eyes forward. You may stray your gaze up or down but never, NEVER to the side.
You deviate from the up, down or straight and your not straight anymore...knowwhatimsayin!
The journey to the Men's Room is a fight for your man hood.
You know damn well you don't want any within arms reach of your twig and berries, especially when you have it out.
So skip a urinal or two or three or hell try to use the one on the other side of the room. The more room the better.
If none of this can be done, you do not go with the open urinal you dirty son of a bitch. Be a man and leave my dick bubble alone and use a stall or wait your turn.