Unspeakable Crimes The 12 Most Ridiculous Costumed Criminals of All Time  

Benjamin Dunn
102.8k views 12 items

Sometimes it just isn't enough to commit a crime. Sometimes you want to do it with a little panache, a little style. These people have taken the art of law breaking to a new level. Whether it is a beloved children's character committing a heinous act, or death himself drunkenly stealing cell phones naked, these are the most ridiculous costumed criminals of all time.

Who are some of the most ridiculous costumed criminals of all time? What are criminal costumes? These people on this list will hopefully give you a guide of what not to wear if you're so dumb to commit a crime.

Man Dressed as Hedgehog Makes Bomb Threat

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Video: YouTube
Police shot a 25-year-old man in Baltimore after he showed up at a TV station claiming to strapped with a bomb. The suspect was wearing a "bomb" that was actually made out of a life vest with chocolate bars attached to it with wire. He was also wearing a hedgehog (or bear???) onesie over the contraption. When he ignored police requests, he was shot by a sniper and taken into custody.

Captain America Arrested with Burrito in Pants

Captain America Arrested with ... is listed (or ranked) 2 on the list The 12 Most Ridiculous Costumed Criminals of All Time
Photo: via Pinterest

It seems to be that whenever you mix costumes and drinking that something unfortunate is going to happen to someone.

This was the case when a costume party full of medical professionals in Florida spilled out into the streets during a pub crawl.

A group of the party goers stopped at a local eatery when a doctor dressed as Captain America decided to make a few additions to his costume. He bought a burrito, shoved it down his tights, and proceeded to ask ladies in the restaurant to touch it. When they declined, he would remove the burrito and start groping them. This, by the way, must have been one resilient burrito. I can barely get one home without it spilling everywhere.

When the police arrived on the scene they could not differentiate the various costumed people, so they had to ask all the Captain Americas to exit the building to be interviewed.

The weirdest part is that there were that many Captain Americas present. To make things worse, he was caught trying to flush a joint down the toilet.

The burrito was later found in his boot and should probably be used for scientific research. They should make a space shuttle out of whatever this kind of burritos they're serving at this place.


Israeli Spider-Man Jumps on Tops of Cars, Swings Webs, Disrupts Peace

Israeli Spider-Man Jumps on To... is listed (or ranked) 3 on the list The 12 Most Ridiculous Costumed Criminals of All Time
Photo: via Pinterest

As much as we don't like to admit it, there are certain criminals that we have to admire, even if they've done something absolutely idiotic to get to where they are today. And the worst thing this guy really did was disrupt the peace, escape from the hospital, and start throwing ropes/lassos at people in traffic, and then jumping on the tops of cars.

Why did he do this, you ask? Nobody knows. Not even him. He told police that after being hit by a car and being taken to the hospital, he woke up wearing the costume with absolutely no recollection of where it came from. So what did he do in his disoriented state?

He got up and fought crime as the costumed hero himself, though "fighting crime" most likely meant lashing out at cars that he, at the time, saw as his "nemeses." 

The anonymous man was jumping on cars while swinging, what was described as, a homemade webline when the police got various calls to the traffic help hotline complaining about something that sounded unbelievable, until authorities showed up at the scene.

Spider-Man never gets along with the cops.


The Stormtrooper Groper

The Stormtrooper Groper is listed (or ranked) 4 on the list The 12 Most Ridiculous Costumed Criminals of All Time
Photo: via Imgur

27-year-old Dorothy MacSwoon was accused of sexually assaulting 10 NYU students over the course of two years. This doesn't sound like that many if you're out on a groping spree, but apparently something like 62% of college students have been molested or sexually harassed in some way on the NYU campus, so the sexually charged spree got some attention.

What makes these incidents more remarkable is that she carried them out while dressed as a Stormtrooper, a neo-facist officer of the Galactic Empire as depicted in the film series, Star Wars.

Now, this isn't the first time that there has been a story of someone dressing up and fondling people, but it is unique in the fact that it was a woman doing this, and also that she apparently had a website dedicated to Stormtrooper fetish photos. A WHOLE WEBSITE, OF SEXY STORMTROOPER PHOTOS.

An entire website that has, sadly, been taken down. Luckily, though, the Internet is riddled with stuff that is no longer available to humanity. Here are some prime examples:

Let's hope there are no nearby trees around, or she's a goner.

These are the sexually predatory legs you're looking for.

She's facing up to 15 years in jail and has a $400,000 fine to pay.