Total Nerd The 12 Most WTF Fighting Games of All Time  

Benjamin Dunn
248 votes 79 voters 177.7k views 12 items Embed
After Street Fighter made it big, the gaming industry decided to pump out fighting game after fighting game that appealed to either complete weirdos or, more often, nobody. These fighting games are weird, awful, strange and just plain absurd. Why were they made? I have no idea, but since they were, let's take a walk down the crazy side of the weirdest/worst fighting games of all time.

What are the worst fighting games? There are some pretty bad video games on this list, and deservedly so. You wonder what the gamemakers were thinking when they made these games, but hey nobody is perfect, right?
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Ranker Video
Video: YouTube

Clayfighter was a straight Street Fighter 2 rip off, but it used pseudo-claymation style graphics instead of your average pixelated, over-muscled heroes. Instead, we got nightmarish, clay versions of things like Frosty the Snowman (lazily named "Bad Mr. Frosty" -- who was cool looking, but slow), Blob and Taffy (you can imagine what each of these characters actually looks like).

The plot was, and yes, there is a "plot", that a clay meteor lands at a circus transforming all the performers into clay versions of themselves with super powers. That being said, I have never been to a circus where the main act was a snowman, but I digress.

For the time, the graphics were pretty "amazing". I remember looking at the box and thinking "woah, 3D games! Wicked!" (you were, also, not a cool kid.)

That coupled with pretty good controls and a catchy theme song makes this probably the best game on the list, which really, doesn't say a lot. Well, nothing positive, at least.

Also Ranked

#87 on The Greatest Fighting Games Ever Made

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Shaq Fu

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Video: YouTube

Made during the, "Let's put Shaq in EVERYTHING!" era, this game was probably the worst thing to ever happen to the Shaq brand. (And yes, I am including Shazam.)

Based on the classic Mortal Kombat format, the game featured a progression through a world where Shaq could hurt people with his magic flaming basketball which, if you're good enough at basketball, anyone can achieve.

Possibly the best thing about this game is the fact that Shaq towers over everyone, just like in real life. The worst thing about it? That it was made at all. The second worst part? Everything about the game.

Shaquille O'Neal casually wanders into a Kung Fu dojo on his way to a charity basketball game in Tokyo, Japan where, after speaking with a kung fu master, he stumbles into another dimension where he's got to rescue a boy named Nezu from an evil mummy. All of these things makes sense because the game is set in Asia. If you disrespectfully wander into a place of study of the martial arts, naturally the man with the highest level of skill will want to talk to you and then send you into another dimension to be a hero using only the main tool you use in your profession (only on fire). Duh.

This game could have been at least guilty-pleasure-worthy if it handled well, but Shaq's limbs are so long throughout every fight, that you're struggling with your basic depth perception, and have to get far away from your enemies just to hit them.

Shaq Fu is more insulting than the fact that somewhere, someone out there thought that this was a good idea for game.

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Video: YouTube

You might remember the catchphrase of Ballz: "To be the champion, you gotta have Ballz!".

Ok, you probably don't remember it. And you probably don't need ballz to be a champion. That's kind of sexist, come to think about it...

Ballz was a 2D fighting game that really tried to add that extra dimension. Graphically similar to Vectorman , Ballz used a bunch of spheres to simulate 3D. Just not well. At all.

The characters were interesting. You had a clown, a monkey, a bodybuilder etc. Since they were all strictly made up off shiny balls, you really couldn't tell the difference between them all. Just differing numbers of stuck-together balls, fighting to the ball-death.

You pretty much could get the same experience by having a clown make a few balloon animals for you and making them fight. At least then you'd get a surprise pop here and there and be able to feel some excitement.

Who thought of this? A really, really lazy designer, that's who. "So, uh, what do you guys want to do with all these character models? Like, what kind of game can we make out of these?" "F*ck it, let's just use these things and make them fight or something, people won't care." "What should we call it?" "I've got just the name... .

And yes, this is how video games are made.
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Strip Fighter 2

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Video: YouTube

Pretty much a direct rip off of Street Fighter 2, you have almost the same graphics, music, heck, even the name sounds like it. Imagine Street Fighter, only that every character dresses as s**tily as Cammy.

This game seems to have only been made for two reasons.

1) People wanted to play as Blanka, but with even less clothes.
2) They wanted there too be a goal for winning other than the thrill of victory.

Let's address these two points.

The game characters are all women, so that should be a plus for the feminists out there that say that video games are only about men. Of course, they are all women who, when you perform a special move, flash their clothes off. So I guess that would be a step back or two or three.

Secondly, the point of the game seems to be to slowly undress a woman that shows up between fights.

Each round you win, she loses a layer of clothing.

Yes, this game turns out to be a fulfillment of my adolescent fantasy, Strip Video Games. (Though I did always think that it would be with a real woman, but this will do, I guess.)

One final thing I want to address with this game is the character of Amanda.On the selection screen she looks like this:
"I have to buy a new mask every time."

When you actually get to fight with her however, she looks like this:

She probably also lies about her weight in her online dating profile

This classic bait and switch should not go unpunished. So I submit the game to this list for some much-deserved ridicule.