The Best & Worst Cartoon Vehicles

They say the car makes the man, right? Or is it hair... shoes? Well, these are the upstaging people movers that, oftentimes, were way cooler than the shows or comics they were in. We start from the best and move to the worst. As it should be.

  • The Batmobile

    The Batmobile
    Photo: DC Comics
    Number one. I'm not sure I even need to expand here. I mean, there's pretty much no cooler made-up set of wheels or wings out there. Batman had a different batmobile for every mood. This car could pretty much do whatever Batman needed it to do whenever he needed it done. And we're talking super-specific stuff. Like, what if he needed a car that could ski down a mountain on a moment's notice? No prob, he just so happened to bring the one that had the skis in the wheel wells... you know... thank goodness he is always thinking ahead. What if he'd brought the one where the tires turn into inflatable rafts? How would he get out of the way of the avalanche then? Although, you know, BATMAN. I'm sure he would have figured something out.
  • The Mystery Machine
    Photo: Scooby-Doo, Where Are You! / Taft Broadcasting
    You have to hand it to anyone who would not only paint their van themselves, but call it an actual Mystery Machine. Which brings up the question, did these guys get paid for their services? Why advertise like that if you aren't going to charge the poor Bed & Breakfast lady for getting rid of that crotchety (yet, surprisingly inventive and committed) old caretaker who really, really wanted her real estate? They drove around (nice color choices, but sadly, no half-naked space chicks with guitars) in their aqua-red-green van visiting a vast assortment of vacation spots (where did they get the money for all these vacations?) and aunts, uncles and cousins... I'm not sure who, exactly, they were advertising TO. In any event, the Mystery Machine was pretty cool, even if it was just a dressy serial killer van (I mean, no windows? And what was up with everyone sitting in the front seat all the time?).
  • Hellcycle

    Ghost Rider is the poster child of "Cool Idea, S**tty Comic." This is a prime example of something surviving exclusively on the coolness of its premise. A guy with a flaming skull riding a souped-up motorcycle from hell. Also, did I mention the FLAMING SKULL? And leather jacket. Imagine if it were denim. With patches. Not really the same. This comic has some of the most historically dull, silly, and stupid storylines of all comics... and yet, they made a movie out of it all the same. Again. Flaming skull.

    And the Hellcycle. God knows, I want one.

  • The Homer

    The Homer
    Photo: The Simpsons / Fox
    Brilliant. Why has no one made this car yet? I'm speaking specifically of the separate sound-proofed dome to enclose the kids in the back seat. Oh, and the cup holders.