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The Best Lolita Quotes

Updated November 14, 2019 32 items

Lolita quotes are certainly quotable for movie fans. These are some of the best quotes from the drama Lolita as determined by you and your votes. Directed by Stanley Kubrick, Lolita starred James Mason as Humbert Humbert, a middle-aged man who becomes obsessed with a teenage girl, Dolores Haze, portrayed by Sue Lyon. The film was released in the summer of 1962 on June 21.

What are the best Lolita quotes? What did you think of Humbert's reply to Charlotte, "The question is, 'does God believe in me'"? Or do you like some of the lesser known lines from the film? Let it be known. Vote for your top Lolita quotes and watch them rise to the top of the list.

  • Are You Quilty?
    Photo: user uploaded image
    Humbert: Quilty, Quilty.
    Quilty: Wha? Wha? What's that?
    Humbert: Are you Quilty?
    Quilty: No, I'm Spartacus. Have you come to free the slaves or somethin'?
    Humbert: Are you Quilty?
    Quilty: Yeah, I am Quilty. Yes, sure.
    Humbert: Shall we have a little chat before we start?
    • Quilty: [after Humbert ignores his ping pong serve] Roman ping...You're supposed to say Roman pong! OK, you serve. I don't mind. I don't - I just don't mind. Come on... [serves again] Roman ping-pong. Kinda tricky serve to handle, eh Captain? Kind of tricky. One of the champs taught me that. I'm not accusing you, Captain, but it's sort of absurd the way people invade this house without even knocking...They use the telephone..
      Humbert: You really don't remember me, do you?
      Quilty: Have you ever noticed how the ...different champs use their bats? You know, some of 'em hold it like this and everything.
      Humbert: Do you recall a girl called Dolores Haze?
      Quilty: I remember the one guy, he didn't have a hand. He had a bat instead of a hand. He's...
      Humbert: [Bangs on the table loudly with the paddle] Lolita?!
      Quilty: Lo-li-tah. Yeah, yeah. I remember that name, all right. Maybe she made some telephone calls. Who cares?
      [Humbert draws a gun]
      Quilty: Hey, you're a sort of bad loser, Captain. I never found a guy who pulled a gun on me when he lost a game. Didn't anyone ever tell ya? It's not really who wins, it's how you play, like the champs. Listen, I don't think I want to play anymore. Gee, I'm just dyin' for a drink. I'm just dyin' to have a drinkie.
      Humbert: You're dying anyway, Quilty. Quilty, I want you to concentrate - you're going to die. Try to understand what is happening to you.
      Quilty: You are either Australian or a German refugee. This is a gentile's house - you'd better run along.
      Humbert: Think of what you did, Quilty, and think of what is happening to you now.
      Quilty: Hee-hee-hee...gee, that's a - that's a durl-in' little gun you got there. That's a durlin' little thing. How much a guy like you want for a-a durlin' little gun like that?
      Humbert: [thrusts out a note for him] Read this.
      Quilty: What's this, the deed to the ranch?
      Humbert: It's your death sentence. Read it.
      Quilty: I can't read, ah, mister. I never did none of that there book learnin', ya know.
      Humbert: Read it, Quilty!
      Quilty: Mmm? 'Because you took advantage of a sinner. Because you took advantage...Because you took...Because you took advantage of my disadvantage.' Gee, that's a dad-blasted durn good poem you done there. 'When I stood Adam-Naked...' Oh! Adam-Naked, you should be ashamed of yourself, Captain. '...before a Federal Law and all its stinging stars.' Tarnation, you old horned toad, that's a mighty pretty...that's a pretty poem. 'Because you took advantage' - Gee, it's getting a bit repetitious, isn't it - 'Because' - there's another one - 'Because you cheated me. Because you took her at an age, when young lads...'
      Humbert: [he snatches the note back] That's enough!
      Quilty: Say, what you take it away for, mister? That was getting kind of smutty there! [laughs]
      Humbert: Do you have any last words?
      Quilty: Listen, Mac. You're drunk, and I'm a sick man. This pistol-packing farce is becoming a sort of nuisance.
      Humbert: Do you want to die standing up or sitting down?
      Quilty: I wanna die like a champion.
      [Humbert fires the gun]
      Quilty: Gee, right in the boxing glove. You want to be more careful with that thing. Listen Captain, why don't you stop trifling with life and death? I'm a playwright. You know, I know all about this sort of tragedy and comedy and fantasy and everything. I've got fifty-two successful scenarios to my credit, added to which my father's a policeman. [He turns to the piano] Listen, you look like a music lover to me. Why don't you let, why, why don't you let me play you a little thing I-I wrote last week? [He begins playing Chopin's Grand Polonaise] Nice sort of opening that, eh? We could dream up some lyrics, maybe. You and I dream them up together, you know, share the profits. Do you think that'll make the hit parade? [Singing] Uh, the moon was blue, and so are you and I tonight...she's mine...yours...she's...she's yours tonight...and...and... [runs from the room]
      [Humbert chases him and fires again, hitting Quilty in the leg]
      Quilty: Gee! Gee, that hurt me, that... You really hurt me. Listen, if you're tryin' to scare me, you did a pretty swell job all right. My leg'll be black and blue tomorrow. You know, this house is roomy and cool. You see how cool it is. I intend moving to England or Florence forever. You can move in. I've got some nice friends, you know, who could come and keep you company here. You could use them as pieces of furniture. This one guy looks just like a bookcase. I could fix it up for you to attend executions, how would you like that? Just you there, nobody else, just watching. Watch! You like watching, Captain? No, cause, not many people know that the, ha-ha, that the chair is painted yellow. You'd be the only guy in the know.
      Humbert shoots him again]
      Quilty: That hurts!
      • Call A Studio
        Photo: user uploaded image
        Charlotte: Yeah, this would be your room. It's what you might call a studio - well, you know, a semi-studio affair ... it's very male - [sigh] - and, uh, quiet. We're really very fortunate here in West Ramsdale. Culturally, we're a very advanced group with lots of good Anglo-Dutch and Anglo-Scotch stock. And, uh, we're very progressive - intellectually.
        Humbert: That is immediately apparent!
        Charlotte: Oh, I do hope you'll want to address our club. There's a nice view from this window - of the front lawn, and a good place for you to do your writing. [gesturing] Shelves for your books...I am Chairman of the Great Books Committee. As a matter of fact, uh, you know, one of the speakers that I had, um, last season, was, uh, Clare Quilty...The writer, TV, TV play -
        Humbert: No, no I wouldn't.
        Charlotte: Oh, he's a very stimulating type of man. He gave us a talk on, hmm, uh, Dr. Schweitzer and Doctor Zhivago.
        • Charlotte: ...The bathroom's back here, right next door. Well, we still have that good old-fashioned quaint plumbing. It should appeal to a European. [She flushes it to demonstrate] WOOSH! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. Oh, excuse the soiled sock! I see that you're interested in art. In that case, in that case, you really must see, uh, the collection of reproductions I have in my bedroom. Voila!...Du-fee, and there's my little Van Gock, Monet. Is Mme. Humbert, umm...?
          Humbert: There's no Madame. We are divorced... A happy divorce.
          Charlotte: When did all this happen?
          Humbert: About a year ago, in Paris.
          Charlotte: Oh, Paris, France...You know, Monsieur, I really believe that it's only in the romance languages that, uh, one is able to really relate in a mature fashion. In fact, I remember when the late Mr. Haze...yes, he's passed on. But, uh, when we were on our honeymoon abroad, I-I knew that I'd never felt married until I'd had myself addressed as seniora.
          Humbert: You're in Spain?
          Charlotte: No, Mexico. He was a lovely human being. A man of complete integrity....Those are his ashes. It's very difficult for a woman, an attractive woman alone, you know, ha-ha.