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The Five-Year Engagement Movie Quotes

Updated June 8, 2017 143 votes 51 voters 40.7k views10 items

'The Five-Year Engagement' movie quotes include the most memorable lines from this 2012 romantic comedy film starring Jason Segel and Emily Blunt as a couple who just can't seem to make it to the altar. Despite their best intentions, things just keep getting in their way. Quotes from 'The Five-Year Engagement,' not surprisingly, are hilarious. See a favorite? Vote it up. And if you have a personal favorite quote that isn't listed, add it.

'The Five-Year Engagement' was co-written by Jason Segel and Nicholas Stoller. Stoller also directed Segel in the 2008 romantic comedy 'Forgetting Sarah Marshall,' and the pair teamed up to write the script for the 2011 comedy 'The Muppets.' 'The Five-Year Engagement' features a great cast, including Segel and Blunt, along with Chris Pratt, Alison Brie, Jacki Weaver, Rhys Ifans and Kevin Hart. When Violet and Tom first get engaged, plans for a wedding are set in motion quickly. But when Violet gets a job offer in Michigan, the big day is put off. Will these two ever tie the knot? Probably, but it'll just take a little longer than they planned.

If you're looking for more excellent movie quotes, check out these pages for the most memorable lines from 'Mirror Mirror,' 'American Reunion,' 'This Means War,' 'The Lucky One,' '21 Jump Street,' 'A Thousand Words,' 'The Vow,' 'Wanderlust,' 'The Hunger Games,' 'Friends With Benefits,' 'New Year's Eve,' 'Crazy, Stupid, Love' and 'Bridesmaids.'
  • 1

    On the Treadmill

    Video: YouTube

    Tom: "You told me that it was gonna be two years. It's sort of like when you're on a treadmill, and you tell yourself 'I want to run five miles today' and now, it's forever miles..."
    Violet: "When was the last time you were on a treadmill? Sorry..."

    Things are beginning to get pretty tense between Violet and Tom. Tom's losing his patience. After waiting years to marry Violet, he's still trying to run on that engagement treadmill.
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  • 2

    Grandparents Do Die

    Photo: flickr / CC0

    Sylvia: "Any ideas when this wedding might happen? Grandparents do have a tendency to die."
    Violet: "Mom, they're all right there."
    Sylvia: "Well, for now..."

    Sylvia has a point. Putting off weddings for years can mean fewer grandparents will be able to attend. Sadly, that holds true for Violet and Tom. When a grandparent does, in fact, pass away before the happy couple can take their walk down the aisle, Sylvia tactfully points out at the funeral, "This is why we do not delay weddings."
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  • 3

    The Proposal

    Photo: flickr / CC0

    Tom: "Violet, I love you. Will you marry me?"
    Violet: "Yes!"

    Ah, young love: So ideal, so exciting! When Tom and Violet get engaged, they both begin to plan their big wedding. Little do they know that life is about to get in the way -- big time.
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  • 4

    Cirque du Soleil of Shows

    Photo: Metaweb / CC-BY

    Tom: "We both know I deserve to get super laid for this."
    Violet: "Do you want me to wear a cape or something?"
    Tom: "I want the show."
    Violet: "You get the Cirque du Soleil of shows..."

    Tom obviously wants a reward for agreeing to put off the wedding for a couple of years, while Violet goes to Michigan to start a new job.
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