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The Internship Movie Quotes

Updated August 8, 2019 350 votes 252 voters 127.1k views10 items

"The Internship" movie quotes really kicks you in the funny bone and follows two out-of-work salesmen competing against youngsters for an internship at Google. The comedy movie was written by Vince Vaughn and Jared Stern with Vaughn also supplying the story and acting as a lead alongside Owen Wilson. Shawn Levy directed the film which was released in the United States on June 7, 2013.

In "The Internship," Nick (Owen Wilson) and Billy (Vince Vaughn) are two semi-successful salesmen who soon find themselves out of work after their company closes under the pressure of the digital age. Having few job skills that could be of use in modern times, Billy signs them up for an interview to join an internship program at Internet giant Google. It certainly doesn't guarantee them a job but it might be their last chance to finding a job that can carry them into the future.

Despite a painfully awkward interview in a Google+ Hangout, Nick and Billy are invited into the internship program alongside hundreds of men and women half their age (and with more experience). They try their best to fit in with the crowd and impress their bosses with the hopes that they will get one of the very few jobs available at Google. John Goodman, Rose Byrne, Max Minghella, Joanna Garcia, Dylan O'Brien and Aasif Mandvi co-star in the comedy movie.

"The Internship" joins a late spring 2013 movie season already packed with hits like "After Earth," "Fast and Furious 6," "The Hangover Part III," "The Great Gatsby," "The Big Wedding," "Admission," "The Incredible Burt Wonderstone," "Emperor," "Dead Man Down," and "Oz: The Great and Powerful."

  • 1

    Interviews On the Internet

    Video: YouTube

    Billy: "This is how people do it now, Nicky. They have their interviews on the Internet."
    Nick: "Ohhh, I like it."
    Billy: "Okay, here they are. Now when I hit this they'll be able to see us."
    Nick: "Yeah, sit up straight."
    Billy: "Come in here. You gotta come in closer so they'll be able to see us."
    Nick: "No, they can see us."
    Billy: "See how small the webcam is? Let's get cheek to cheek."
    Benjamin: "Uh, we can see you guys"
    Billy: [yelling] "Okay, great!"
    Nick: [yelling] "You got us?"
    Billy: [yelling] "Hi, my name is Billy."
    Alison: "We can hear you fine as well."
    Billy: "Oh, great"
    Nick: "Good"
    Billy: "Billy McMann"
    Nick: "Nick Campbell"
    Benjamin: "I'm Benjamin"
    Alison: "Alison. We're going to ask you a few questions that some of our candidates find a little bit odd."
    Nick: "Let's get weird!"
    Billy: "No judgement! Shoot!"
    Benjamin: "You're shrunken down to the size of nickels and dropped to the bottom of a blender. What do you do?"
    Billy: "You take it flat on your back and…"
    Nick: "Right, right, you just lay back. You just enjoy the ride. You enjoy that breeze!"
    Billy: "You are light as a feather…"
    Nick: "You pretend it's a fan."
    Billy: "You let the blades whip all around you like" [makes blender noises] "It's like getting an MRI."
    Benjamin: "Once this blender's on, it's on forever."
    Alison: "It's on."
    Nick: "Respectfully I've gotta disagree. We've sold blenders and even the best model in the world is only gonna run maybe 10 or 11 hours. So we're getting out and when we do, we're better off for it because whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger."
    Billy: "It's not so much getting out of the blender, it's what happens next. That's the question."
    Nick: "You've got two nickel-sized men free in the world. Think of the possibilities."
    Billy: "I mean, on top of my head, and I'm just speculating, sunglass repair. We'd be hell on those little screws."
    Nick: "Maybe stick us in those submarines that they put in people's bodies to fight diseases."
    Benjamin: "Okay, that's not a real thing, the submarines."
    Alison: "No"
    Billy: "Wait a minute. I thought we were stuck in a blender. Now we're saving lives? What?!"
    Alison and Benjamin: "What?"
    Nick and Billy: "What?!"
    Alison and Benjamin: "What?"
    Billy: "Let me just recap this for you real quick. We start off in a blender. Now we're saving lives!"
    Nick and Billy: "What?!"
    Benjamin: "What?"
    Alison: "What?"
    Benjamin: "What?"
    Billy: "Wait a minute. We were stuck in a blender."
    Nick: "What a journey!"
    Billy: "And now we're saving lives! What?!"
    Nick: "You guys lead us to this. Thank you!"

    An introductory interview with the folks from Google starts and ends quite awkwardly for Nick and Billy. Google says they are looking for people who think differently but Nick and Billy might have taken their quirkiness just a bit too far.
    Should this be higher or lower?
  • 2

    Pound Me!

    Photo: flickr / CC0

    Lile: "I'm Lile, one of the team managers. Pound me!"
    Billy: "Oh, normally just putting the fist out without the words is all that's necessary."
    Lile: "Come on, bro, fist me. Get up in there!"
    Nick: "Yeah, that's definitely not right."

    Lile, a team manager in the internship program, takes the fist bump to a creepy new level of sexual innuendo. As Billy mentions, simply putting s fist out for a bump is the standard over asking another person to "fist me."
    Should this be higher or lower?
  • 3

    We Have Rules

    Video: YouTube

    Mr. Chetty: "We have rules. The red paddle indicates no. The green paddle indicates yes… Having a beer with your boss…"
    [All interns display the red paddle for no except Billy and Nick]
    Billy: "If you want to grab a cold one with me you let me know."
    Mr. Chetty: "I will not be grabbing a cold one with you."
    Billy: "You get high?"

    For some unbeknownst reason, after getting word from Mr. Chetty that an employee hanging out and drinking beer with a boss is not appropriate at Google, Billy asks Mr. Chetty if instead of drinking, he'd rather use drugs. We can only imagine that the question did not go over well.
    Should this be higher or lower?
  • 4

    Professor Xavier

    Video: YouTube

    Mr. Chetty: [on video] "Your job: Find the bug!"
    Stuart: "Why don't the two of you guys right now go and find the programmer."
    Fellow Male Intern: "His name is Charles Xavier"
    Fellow Female Intern: "He's a professor at Stanford."
    Stuart: "He's in a wheelchair."
    Billy: "Got it, Stanford, wheelchair"
    Nick: "Yes!"

    Billy: "Charles Xavier?"
    Man in Wheelchair: "Very funny"
    Billy: "Professor Xavier, we know that it's you."
    Man in Wheelchair: "You found me out. Cyclops, Rogue, we're all here. Now, I want to share some of my wisdom with you."
    Billy: "Professor Xavier is a…"

    In an effort to impress their internship teammates, Billy and Nick head to Stanford to track down the professor who created the program they're working on. Before asking too many questions, Billy and Nick confront a man in a wheelchair they believe to be the professor and end up both getting punched as a result.
    Should this be higher or lower?