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READ The Most Hilariously Negative New Years Eve Movie Reviews  

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The reviews for "New Years Eve" are in, and they aren't so stellar. In fact, as of the making of this list the movie is sitting at 5% on Rotten Tomatoes. That's almost as bad as Jack and Jill or Bucky Larson.

I hear you asking, "How can a movie starring almost all of Hollywood's A-List be bad?" Well, as one critic so aptly put, just because great food tastes good, doesn't mean that you should eat all of it at once. Plus, who knew that the follow up to last years gag-fest "Valentine's Day" could be bad. Everyone I guess, but VD made so much money it was inevitable that there would be a follow up.

At least everyone can rest easy knowing that this movie gives the critics an excuse to make as many ball dropping and champagne puns as possible. If you want to see some really cool movie quotes check out the Matrix quotes list.
1

Richard Roeper, Chicago-Sun Times


" It's all perfectly pleasant and perfectly harmless and perfectly bland."

Usually "pleasant" and "harmless" aren't that bad, but when you add bland to that you change the thing entirely. It seems that Roeper thinks that NYE is on the same level as your aunts tuna casserole.
2

Stephen Whitty, The Star-Ledger


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"I suppose it’s almost sweet that they’d think a group of Manhattan high schoolers would be worried about how to kiss. Almost. But there’s nothing inherently hysterical about 'foreign' accents. Or made-up words for 'vagina.'"

I think what Stephen Whitty is trying to say in his review is that high schoolers don't need kissing advice, but unplanned pregnancy tips.
3

Eric D. Snider, Film.com


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"The obvious thing to do when you have found a very easy way to make a lot of money without putting forth any effort, is to do it again. Marshall and Fugate have therefore re-teamed for New Year’s Eve, which is not a sequel (it has none of the same characters) but is instead an even lazier, even dumber re-hash of Valentine’s Day"

I think what Eric Snider's review is saying that just because one didn't die when throwing themselves out of a plane without a parachute doesn't mean one should attempted it a second time.
4

Melissa Anderson, Village Voice


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"Mayans might have predicted the end of the world in 2012, but could they have known that the countdown to eternal hellfire would begin with Garry Marshall's New Year's Eve?"

Melissa Anderson's review might come off as harsh at first, but then when you consider that you will never get back that time you would have spent watching this movie you might just want to thank her.