A Few Things My Kitten Has Eaten  

Carly Kiel
1.5k views 8 items

List Rules Only things my own kitten has eaten that he wasn't supposed to eat. No other foods, objects, or materials.

A friend found my kitten, Louie, sniffing around a Dumpster when he was just 4 weeks old. I took him in because my older cat, Maddie (10), seemed like she could use a friend and also because I had Kitten Fever. Oh boy, was Louie cute - a cuddly little puff of purring striped grey fur. Too small to jump on anything, too weak to cause much damage with teeth or claws, for the first few weeks, Louie was a sweet precious angel who mainly wanted to feel safe and take naps. Then he got big enough to climb on furniture, open cabinets and drawers, and etc. Now, 8 months later, my kitten and I are in constant battle wherein he wants to eat every single thing, and my job as a ~parent~ is to keep him alive by only letting him eat food that is appropriate and healthy for a baby cat. Here is a list of some of my failures / Louie's feats of intestinal fortitude.
Broken Glass
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Video: YouTube
While I was getting dressed one morning, I heard the kind of crash that you sometimes hear when you have cats. It is hardly ever an emergency. Some long, suspiciously quiet minutes later, I found Louie crouched on the kitchen floor. He was licking up an entire jar's worth of pasta sauce, including any shattered glass that was in his way. The unopened jar had been on a high shelf in the cabinet where I keep his food - now in a plastic container that clicks to locks shut. Also, since Louie can't be trusted, I now have cool kitten-proof child locks on those cabinet doors.
Cardboard is listed (or ranked) 2 on the list A Few Things My Kitten Has Eaten
Photo: via Wikimedia
Like all cats, Louie loves to use his claws on furniture, my pants, my skin, etc. I got him one of these cheap corrugated cardboard scratchy things. He likes to scratch it, and he also likes to tear it apart with his teeth and sometimes to even swallow pieces of it. 
Avocado is listed (or ranked) 3 on the list A Few Things My Kitten Has Eaten
Photo: via Reddit
You know who loves avocado? Both of my cats. I can give the older one a scooped-out shell to lick, and she will just be happy as a cat with some avocado residue. But Louie can't be trusted. One time, when I tried to take the skin away from him, he growled, hissed, and swatted at me like I was trying to take away his dead chipmunk that he caught himself and no one bought at a store. I tried to trick him by tossing treats across the room as a distraction. Instead of chasing them, Louie let the older cat crawl underneath him and eat a treat that was right under his own body. In about a minute, he ate the entire avocado skin, including the sticker that came on it. "But Carly! Carly! Isn't avocado skin toxic to cats?" IDK. All I can tell you is that this was like a month ago, and he is still alive.

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Countless Earplugs is listed (or ranked) 4 on the list A Few Things My Kitten Has Eaten
Photo: via Twitter
Countless Earplugs

I sleep in earplugs, but sometimes, they fall out of my head and onto the floor, and I don't think much about it. Gross. Oh well, we can't all be as ladylike as Queen Noor. Anyway, I have my own personal living, breathing earplug vacuum. Sometimes, I see Louie actually eating them - or opening my nightstand drawers to dig around for them - but more often, I just spot them undigested in his litter box.

Whoa! Gross! A litter box in a house with two cats! Well, the truth is that I have three litter boxes.