While most video games give us some truly unique and enviable fashion, there are just some characters that don't know basic fashion rules. From the obsurd to the just plain ugly, these video game characters could learn a few things from Tim Gunn or Michael Kors. We could call this the What Not To Wear: Video Game Edition.Here are the worst dressed video game characters from 2011.
25. Tom Reed - Splinter Cell Conviction
So how do you screw up the most basic of all upper-crust male outfits, the black suit? Well we should ask the modelers at Ubisoft this very question, since I've seen the concept art for Tom Reed, the heavy of the game, and it looks pretty stylish.
No the failure here isn't at the conceptual level (with the exception of his eternally popped collar), but in the practical space. Once this guy's body had dimensions, the suit they threw on him no longer fit properly, and hence we get a villain who looks like a kid who raided his older brother's closet.
The Jacket's too big, the pants are too baggy. It just makes the character seem incredibly inept every time you look at him making every ounce of thread on his being an ounce of pity.
Sure, it would really not be much of a problem if he was almost any other character in the game, but when you're an important villain, it's kind of a problem if you dress like an NPC.
24. Bessie Kent - Dead Rising 2
While we're still in the realm of the practical outfits, let's take a walk over to Fortune City, where a bevy of NPC survivors provide us with - gah!? What the hell type of dress is that?
Bessie is apparently wearing some sort of dress that is trying to reinterpret the French flag, but even just draping the flag over yourself would look better than whatever the designers here decided to put all over this poor woman, which really ended up looking more like a Korean dry cleaners owner accidentally wearing something someone intentionally forgot in your store.
You meet Bessie here on a rescue mission where she and some other girls attempt to take advantage of the zombie outbreak to go shopping for shoes.Let me tell you girl, shoes are the last thing you should be going shopping for.
23. Barry Wheeler - Alan Wake
Don't get me wrong - I love Barry! He's probably one of the main reasons to play Alan Wake; a rather endearing sidekick who sticks with our hero Alan "I'm a Writer" Wake throughout his adventures in the ironically named Bright Falls while hordes of shadow monsters try to kill them both. But you can tell the dud is single, and that no one in his life was helping him pick out his clothes:
Funnily enough though, as you progress through the game, Barry's outfit get's a tad bit worse- if more practical.
Since said monsters in Alan Wake are hurt by light, Barry gets a "bright" idea when he stumbles into a hardware store and covers himself up in Christmas tree lights!
It's an outfit that makes sense, but I definitely wouldn't recommend it for a night on the town. Or for cosplayers - and of course that's just bound to happen. . .
22. Lori Machete - Unbound Saga
Speaking of "bound" how about Unbound Saga? A little downloadable Brawler that came to Xbox LIVE arcade in 2010?
Now the main lead, Rick Ajax, definitely looks fairly ridiculous, but he ain't got nothing on his female sidekick, Lori Machete:
So yeah this game is like Final Fight, and apparently Lori here went to the "Poison" school of dressing and went with the "14 year old hooker in an 80s movie dystopia" look, deciding to show off pretty much every inch of her body she could get away with while wearing completely clashing mini-skirt, mini-shirt outfit and alternating pieces of stocking on the wrong appendages instead of making anything even slightly recognizable.
Then there's the fact that you can see the strings of her thong, which adds a whole new "Ke$ha video" class to the whole ensemble.Now that's kind of the point of the characters in this game I guess, but Jesus, I just generally don't wake up in the morning and decide,"you know, I'd really like to take on the persona of a prostitute today!" Not every day... not every day...