Weird History
308 voters

Who Was The Toughest Of History’s Legendary Warriors?

March 11, 2020 2.2k votes 308 voters 7.0k views16 items

List RulesVote up the warriors who would fare best in a "Battle Royale" situation.

In the era of the battle royale, it’s no wonder that renewed interest has arisen in deciphering once and for all who the toughest warriors of all time were, both in the general sense and in the specific. Ranking various historical armies and their members is all well and good, but the real excitement comes from matching up the most notable military figures from the annals of history and trying to figure out which of them would win in an all-out fight to the finish. 

Back in the days before firepower became the deciding factor in warfare, military leaders could play a more direct role in combat, and some of history’s greatest men and women weren’t afraid to get their swords dirty right alongside their troops. It is these historical brawlers who make for the best hypothetical fight cards and for some truly combative debates. 

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  • Photo: Hermann Vogel / Wikimedia Commons / Public Domain

    Where and When: Spartacus was born in Thrace sometime around 100 BCE, but he didn’t stay there long, joining the Roman auxiliary as a young man before eventually deserting. This led to him being captured, enslaved, and sent to the gladiatorial pits. From there, Spartacus organized a slave revolt that eventually swelled to tens of thousands, defeating the Romans a handful of times before perishing in battle in 71 BCE.

    The Arsenal: Spartacus himself and those other members of his rebellion to come from the gladiatorial pits would have had access to any number of weapons, including gladius swords, wooden shields, and leather armor. As a Thracian specifically, Spartacus would have used a parmula shield and a short sica sword, angled at the end. 

    His Training: Spartacus should have been an exceptionally well-trained individual. Not only did he grow up in the militaristic society of Thrace, but he was also trained as a member of the Roman auxiliary. Then after all that, he went to one of Rome’s famous “gladiator schools,” where he learned all manner of one-on-one combat. 

    In The Duel: Unlike most of the other great military leaders in history who typically only fought at the head of an army, Spartacus had plenty of experience facing solo opponents as a gladiator, which should serve him well in any hypothetical duel. His legendary ability to inspire others wouldn’t serve him well, but his craftiness and ability to adapt - as well as his willingness to fight dirty - would.

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    • Photo: KoizumiBS / Wikimedia Commons / CC BY-SA 4.0

      Where and When: Genghis Khan, born Temujin, is one of the most recognizable figures in all of history. He united the tribes of Mongolia in the 12th century and then turned them outward, soon conquering an empire that spanned much of the Asian continent. Along the way, Genghis Khan and his Mongolian horde took out tens of millions of people. 

      The Arsenal: Like most Mongols, Genghis Khan did much of his fighting on horseback, and that technological advantage was the primary reason for the rapid expansion of his empire. That meant he was most comfortable wielding a composite bow, a lance, or a battle-ax, though he could also make use of a short sword when more close-quarters combat was called for. 

      His Training: Much of Mongolian training under Genghis Khan was informal. Children grew up competing in various martial-themed athletics until they were proficient with all manner of weaponry. From there on out, most of their education came on the campaign trail where their ability to quickly overwhelm their opponents ensured that every Mongol got plenty of experience in the art of killing. 

      In The Duel: The keyword for Genghis Khan is brutality. He and his army rode into battle on horseback at a furious pace and set about making mincemeat of anyone they could get their hands on. He used drums and flag signals to organize his troops through the chaos, and that only added to their cold efficiency. In any sort of duel, Genghis Khan is going to come at his opponents fast and hard, and he’s not going to stop until somebody is dead. 

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      • Photo: Miyamoto Musashi / Wikimedia Commons / Public Domain

        Where and When: Miyamoto Musashi’s own book opens with a line that roughly translates to “My name is Miyamoto Musashi, I have killed over sixty men in fights and duels.” Equally renowned for his swordsmanship as for his artistic talents, Musashi took the life of his first man at age 13, went on to live as a ronin for the rest of his long life, and wrote an important book on warfare on his deathbed in 1645. 

        The Arsenal: Musashi wouldn’t be bringing just one sword to the fight - he’d be bringing two. That’s because he invented his own brand of dual-wielding fencing known as nitō ichi-ryū. Those two katana-style blades and some minimal armor would be all he needed. 

        His Training: As a young man, Musashi was trained in the art of sword-fighting by his father. But given that he won his first duel at the age of 13, it’s no surprise that he quickly transitioned into a self-taught battler. Not only did he eventually open up his own nitō ichi-ryū school of sword-art, he went on to train several individuals who would go on to be influential in Japanese history.

        In The Duel: Right off the bat, Musashi will have one major advantage: the number of swords in his hands compared to his opponents. Even if he loses one of them, he has a perfect record in one-sword duels, too. Having beaten at least 60 opponents in one-on-one duels, and with a possibly apocryphal tale of taking down dozens of assailants at once in one incident, there’s not going to be anybody in this brawl with more experience. 

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        • Photo: Unknown / Wikimedia Commons / Public Domain

          Where and When: As if his nickname weren’t enough indication, Alexander the Great is considered to be one of the very best military leaders in all of history. In just seven short years as King of Macedon from 336 to 323 BCE, Alexander went conquest-wild and earned himself a bunch of other titles like King of Persia, Pharaoh of Egypt, and Lord of Asia. In anticlimactic fashion, however, he perished on his way home by either natural causes or poison.

          The Arsenal: Alexander’s father, Philip II, refurbished the Macedonian army before handing it off to his son. Under his reign, infantry started to carry an enormous sarissa, a 22-foot pike with an iron tip that could be used to take down charging cavalry with ease. Alexander is alternately depicted wielding either a spear on horseback or a much shorter sword, but he’s always shown in shining armor. 

          His Training: Of all the legendary leaders of antiquity, Alexander the Great probably had the best education. He was personally tutored by Aristotle throughout his youth in everything but the art of warfare, which he learned directly from his father. While much of the focus would have been on strategy, it’s also obvious that Alexander was brought up to be an excellent fighter.

          In The Duel: The most famous swing of Alexander’s sword was at an inanimate object, the Gordian Knot, but that doesn’t mean he wasn’t capable on the battlefield. In combat against the Persian Empire, he led his Royal Companion Cavalry charging right into the heart of the enemy. In one particular incident, Alexander was said to have caught up to Darius’ fleeing chariot and dispatched the driver, only for Darius to escape his clutches. If Alexander is showing up at a fight, he’s doing so on horseback, and with a brilliant strategy already in mind to defeat his opponent.

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