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The Best 'Toy Story' Puns

Updated January 27, 2020 1.2k votes 199 voters 7.8k views11 items

List RulesVote up the most brilliant 'Toy Story' puns.

Children's movies are notorious for their jokes, and Toy Story puns are some of the best. Each time Mr. Potato head mentions "laser envy" or Ham tells the other toys to look away until he gets his cork back in left parents laughing and kids something new to appreciate when they rewatched the movies years later. This list is full of puns and innuendos that might've flown right over your head when you first watched these movies.

  • 1

    "Hey, Hamm. Look, I'm Picasso!" "I don't get it." "You uncultured swine."

    Toy Story (1995)

    Mr. Potato Head rearranged his face much like famed artist Picasso would paint faces. When Hamm, the piggy bank, says he doesn't get it, Mr. Potato Head calls him "uncultured swine." This is a burn that stings twice as Hamm is dissed for not knowing fine art and for being a pig.

  • 2

    "Buzz, will you give me a hand?”

    Toy Story (1995)

    While trapped inside bad kid Sid's house, Woody devises a plan for escape. Because Buzz is brainwashed into thinking he's a toy called Mrs. Nesbitt, he's not cooporating in the escape efforts. Frantic, Woody shouts "Buzz, will you get up here and give me a hand?!"

    He's answered with Buzz's arm tossed at his feet.

  • 3

    “I’m just a couple of blocks away.”

    Toy Story (1995)

    While flirting with Woody, Bo Peep reminds him where he can find her, saying "I'm just a couple of blocks away" as she strolls past wooden blocks. Groan-worthy, cute, and supremely punny.

  • 4

    "No one takes my wife's mouth but me!"

    Toy Story 3 (2010)

    The villain of Toy Story 3 is Lotso, a not so nice teddy bear. He takes Mrs. Potato Head's mouth and Mr. Potato Head exclaims, "No one takes my wife's mouth but me!"

  • 5

    "Nobody look till I get my cork back in!"

    Toy Story 2 (1999)

    Hamm is a piggy bank and while outside, his cork pops out. Panicked, he attempts to shield himself below the belt and shouts "Nobody look at me till I get my cork back in!"

  • 6

    "I don't think those were Lincoln Logs."

    Toy Story 3 (2010)

    After escaping a sandbox, Mr. Potato Head falls before the other imprisoned toys at the daycare. Hamm says, "I don't think those were Lincoln Logs," referring to the likelihood of cat poop.

  • 7

    "But I don’t wanna use my head!"

    Toy Story 2 (1999)

    The toys are in an air vent spying on Stinky Pete and his crew to see what they're doing with Woody. Rex asks Buzz what they're going to do and Buzz replies, "Use your head."

    Cut to the group running with Rex in their arms head first to bust out the air vent grate and Rex shouting, "But I don't wanna use my head!"

  • 8

    "Laser envy."

    Toy Story (1995)

    Buzz Lightyear is introduced to the other toys and while showing off his features, they learn that he has a laser. Mr. Potato Head asks Woody why he doesn't have a laser and feeling a little self-conscious, Woody fires back, "It's not a laser, it's a little lightbulb that blinks!"

    Hamm asks what's going on and Mr. Potato Head says "Laser envy."

  • 9

    "Watch out for puddles."

    Toy Story 3 (2010)

    While walking from room to room throughout the daycare, Lotso warns the toys to "Watch out for puddles." Normally, this would refer to water, but he likely means pee as they're crossing through a bathroom.

  • 10

    "Whoa, pork bellies are falling!"

    Toy Story 2 (1999)

    As the toys climb an elevator shaft together, Hamm's belly opens up, spilling some coins. They hit Slinky Dog who delivers the line, "Whoa, pork bellies are falling!"

  • 11

    “Quiet, musical hog!”

    Toy Story 3 (2010) 

    With Andy in his teens, his toys are accidentally donated to a daycare. Here, they meet their new nemesis, Lotso. He and his gang trap the toys in wire cubbies, reminiscent of jail cells. 

    After hours in their cells, Hamm brandishes a harmonica and begins to play. Buzz has been reset and is working for the bad guys, standing guard. He shouts "Quiet, musical hog!"