Every true horror fan has lain awake at night wondering if they’re more of a Dracula or an Edward Cullen. Fortunately, the stars are even older than some of the Earth's most daunting vampires and are here to help you figure out which vampire you are according to your zodiac sign. Like ghosts and straight up creepy traits, vampires adhere to the zodiac.
Which fictional vampire matches up with your star sign? Are you a possessive Universal Monster who only cares about establishing transatlantic real estate, or are you the kind of vampire who eternally suffers after sacrificing everything for the people you love? Once you compare your sign to these famous vampires, you’ll finally be able to rest, knowing the heart of a specific lifeless bloodsucker sits within your bones.
The most outwardly violent and aggressive vampire is Count Orlok from the 1922 German Expressionist film Nosferatu, and he is such an Aries (March 21 - April 19). This bat-like bad boy doesn't want to seduce you, and he doesn't care about real estate like many of the vampires that followed - he just wants to drink your blood.
If you've ever been stuck on a transatlantic ship with an Aries, you how impulsive and irritating they can be if things don't go according to their plan.
In Francis Ford Coppola's Bram Stoker's Dracula, Gary Oldman plays the classic bloodsucker with a possessive nature that makes him seem more like an ex-husband in a Lifetime movie than it does an immortal demon. Like a classic Taurus (April 20 - May 20), this Dracula can't let anything go.
So what if Mina Harker looks exactly like your ex? That doesn't mean she's your property. This version of Dracula does care about Mina, but that love quickly turns dark when he doesn't get his way.
Has there ever been a vampire that was more two-faced than David from The Lost Boys? Throughout the film he subtly alternates between being a charming bad boy who's willing to bring Michael into his vampire clan and a complete jerk who makes people think they're eating maggots.
He is able to switch gears as quickly as the best of Geminis (May 21 - June 20).
Cancers (June 21 - July 22), people love you. Seriously, everyone has to love and thank you constantly for everything you do because if they don't, you'll throw a huge fit. Your martyr complex makes you the perfect match for Edwin Cullen, that glittery, constantly smoldering member of the walking dead who dedicates his life to pleasing Bella and making sure that everyone knows he's given up everything for her.
If there's one thing Leos (July 23 - August 22) love, it's Drama. They crave the spotlight and if all eyes aren't on them then they freak out. This the M.O. for Lestat to a T. Since there's no way to embed a Powerpoint presentation about Lestat's love for recognition and capital-D Drama, here's a bullet point list of outlandish stunts that he's pulled in the name of attention:
Turn a 5-year-old girl into a vampire, damning her to an eternity of being a child.
Starts working at a theater where he soon becomes the main actor in the repertoire.
Forms a band with the explicit purpose of telling the mortal world about vampires.
Hooks up with the "mother of all vampires" much to the chagrin of, like, every other vampire.
He tries to commit suicide by walking into the sun but can't die because he's so special.
Bela Lugosi's portrayal of Dracula in Universal's genre-defining film is such a control freak. His meticulous planning goes beyond wanting to make sure he and his three sisters have a place to live in both Transylvania and England; it careens into a manic desire to treat life like the perfect chess game. This is Virgo (August 23 - September 22) to the extreme.
If Dracula tried to exert so much control over every situation in Dracula, he likely would have been able to go about his business drinking blood across Europe forever. But oh no, he just had to build a house of cards that was simply begging to get knocked down.
