Intimacy in comic books can be a little deviant. Sometimes superhero sex stories are overt and freely depicted, but sometimes subtle innuendo is all the readers get. Even more difficult to glean sometimes is how those how comic book characters lost their virginity in the first place. It is hard to imagine, as some of these superheroes have powers that would get in the way. How could anyone take Rogue's V-card without getting drained of life in every possible way? She would be quite a dangerous partner in the boudoir. But it happened, as it did for others.
Sometimes a character will have a sweet love story and lose their virginity in the most romantic way possible, like Aquaman. On the flip side, there are characters who lost it in some of the creepiest scenes imaginable.
Scarlet Witch And Quicksilver Partake In Forbidden LovePhoto: Marvel Comics
That's right, Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver straight up "Lannistered" all over the place. But it gets even worse. In this storyline, there's a strong implication that Wolverine is their father, having slept with their mother around the same time Magneto did.
Well, during one of Wanda and Pietro's dalliances, a hairy man peeks through the bushes. That man may very well be the father of those twins.2,218262Is this messed up?
Archangel Deflowers A Teen In Front Of Her MomPhoto: Marvel Comics
Uncanny X-Men, indeed. Paige Guthrie, AKA Husk, loses her virginity at age 19 to Archangel, who is likely in his 30s at the time. Inexplicably, this takes place in the air as a group of X-Men (and Guthrie's mom) look on in insufficient bemusement.
There's just so much wrong with this, especially the lighthearted nature in which it's depicted as if something like this is anything but horrific. In fact, it is one of many reasons Chuck Austen's run of Uncanny X-Men is not remembered fondly.1,823325Is this messed up?
Hal Jordan Sleeps With A Fellow, Younger Green LanternPhoto: DC Comics
Hal Jordan sleeps with a fellow Green Lantern named Arisia, an elf-like alien woman who doted over him for quite some time. That sounds fine, right? Well, when she was doing all that doting, she was actually a child - something comparable to a 14-year-old human (though she looked even younger) - and through her desire to be with Hal, she subconsciously used the power of her ring to age rapidly into a grown woman.
Hal took note of that and slept with her not long after.1,282509Is this messed up?
Superman Loses His Virginity As A Kid To A Brainwashed GirlPhoto: DC Comics
There's a messed up 1977 Superman tale: DC Super-Stars Giant #12 , "Don't Call Me Superboy." In this wild adventure, Kal-El's robot teacher from Krypton arrives on Earth and puts Clark through a series of tests. After one of Clark's classmates, Misty, learns of his identity, they sleep together. Shortly thereafter, however, she is slain by marauding sasquatches.
Clark is enraged, on the verge of offing one of the Bigfoots, but he stops because he does not take lives. And that was the final test. The Kryptonian robot teacher appears to praise Kal-El and reveals that Misty was actually from a neighboring town; this robot took her and brainwashed her so he could manufacture this love affair with Clark. Misty wasn't actually slain, but she did unwittingly sleep with a man. Years later, Clark actually bumps into her on a plane, on which she's a flight attendant.
This story is often overlooked because it's assumed Clark was a virgin before Lois, but if this is canon, he most certainly was not.981459Is this messed up?